Belong

~Five~

I sighed as the cool seeped into my skin, I was supposed to be "inside", but I decided to go outside, with severed penis as my company.

I was moping about my life, and it's not doing any good. And the thing with Derek, I wasn't supposed to feel that...that...that thing.

I couldn't even comprehend what happened, and I wasn't that girl who makes her moves first. And yet, I was the one who kissed him first, and I felt that...spark. It's not supposed to happen that way. I'm supposed to be in my bed, sleeping. Then wake up, and go on with my life.

I wasn't supposed get tangled in this mess. However, I woke up on the couch, naked. So it was unavoidable.

I wasn't supposed to feel those things for Derek, it was supposed to be for someone else who's actually real in my universe. But, he's not...here, and not real.

I sighed. I heard a door open, "What're you doing out here?" Cristina's voice called out. I turned around, "sitting here with the penis, what about you?" She walked around the bench, and sat next to me.

"Hiding from pig-head," she sighed, "Alex?" I guessed. She nodded, her eyes crinkled at the corners.

"I kissed Derek," I blurted out, she turned her head at me, "you kissed Derek?" She asked incredulously, I nodded, "in the elevator, I was having a bad morning."

"So this is what you do? Kissing Doctor McDreamy? On your bad mornings?" She shook her head, and we both got up from the bench. I shrugged, "well, that, and you know, carrying around a penis just makes everything seem so peachy as fuck," I mumbled. We were about to go into the building, she laughed slightly, but was interrupted by a screech from tires, and we saw a man stumbling out of the driver's seat, and fell down onto the concrete.

The rapist.

~-B-~

Bailey grilled us on our knowledge of why we couldn't attach the severed penis to the man's body.

Cristina spoke, "Teeth don't slice, they tear, you can only reattach with a clean cut. If she wanted to slice him off with a knife..." she trailed off, "and the digestive juices didn't leave much of the flesh to work with." I shrugged after I included my statement.

Bailey quickly glanced up at us, "okay, so what do we do?"

"Sew him up minus a large part of the family jewels." I stifled my grin when Cristina said it.

"His outlook?"

I spoke up, "He'll be urinating out of a bag for a very, very long time."

Then Cristina voiced her professional statement, "not to mention he'll never be able to have sex again." She shrugged carelessly, "oh too bad" I said in false pity tone. "Shame," Cristina mocked. Bailey looked at us, and I saw her lips twitches.

"Let's all take a moment to grieve. Clamp."

~-B-~

After dealing with the Peds, thankfully Burke decided to join in.

I walked to Alison's room, and saw Derek in there.

"Have you been here all night?" I asked wistfully, he glanced at me, "Yup. You know I have four sisters? Very girly, tons of kids. If I was in a coma, they'd all be here. I'd want them here. Having no one? Can't imagine that." He walked around me to the sink.

"I can," I'd never imagine it till now, I felt his gaze, "What're you talking about, what about your mother? She'd be in here ordering all the surgeons around. She'd fly these cowboys in from Prague to do these amazing medical procedures." He dried his hands, and then walked to lean against the door frame.

I sighed, "I do have my mother," not my real mom.

There was a moment of silence, then he glanced at me, "so we're kissing but we're not going to date?"

I rolled my eyes, I should've not done that, kissing him in the elevator, I mean.

I sighed, "I knew that was going to come up." He quickly looked at me, "Don't get me wrong, I like the kissing. I'm all for the kissing. More kissing, I say." He smirked at me, I mentally counted to three.

"I honestly have no clue what that was about." I confessed, "Is it going to happen again? Because if it is, I need to bring breath mints." Then he quickly look around, then mouths, "put a condom in my wallet."

"Shut up," I slightly smiled, and he laughed.

I mentioned something about a baby, and then few minutes, Alison's heart monitor went crazy, I quickly went in after Derek, and I slammed my hand against the alarm on the wall.

~-B-~

I was sitting in Chief's office with severed penis on the table. I quickly signed my name onto the papers, and I almost wrote my actual last name, Hastings.

But no.

It's Reagan Grey

That name began to sink in.

Doctor Webber explained a little about the papers, then he said, "It...just says that the, um...the..."

I laughed, "penis."

Doctor Webber laughed, "I'm a doctor, it shouldn't be weird to say this, but I used to change her diapers..." he trailed off.

I felt a pang of sympathy, knowing what is in his mind.

My...Meredith's mother, Ellis Grey. She had an affair with Doctor Webber during their residency. She loved him so much that she left Thatcher...more of Thatcher leaving her, sad part about the whole thing, Webber didn't leave Adele, his wife, leaving Ellis cold, and bitter for the rest of her life.

"I get it," I smiled awkwardly.

A policeman came in through the door, and I happily handed him the cooler. "One penis out of my custody." I smiled, feeling better.

~-B-~

I was walking by when I saw Derek walking into rapist's room, and I heard a whack which indicates that he woke him up by hitting the hospital bed.

I heard a grogginess, then Derek's voice came out of the room, "I have good news and bad news. The good news is, Dr. Bailey stopped your bleeding. The bad news is, we're giving your penis to the cops. Have a nice life." Then he walked out, then stopped once he saw me, he swallowed. I smiled at him, "sorry for stopping you, I uh, I'm scrubbing in for a surgery for the baby." I smiled excitedly, and he smiled, a genuine smile.

I feel like things will be okay.

~-B-~

I walked by the window that has babies in the room, George and Izzie walked by and stopped.

I sighed, they were staring at me far too long, "okay, fine, George and Izzie, you can move into the house." I smiled tightly, then they reacted like I expected.

I laughed and shook my head. Cristina walked by, "I blame the babies, they're toxic," she whispered in my ear. I slapped her arm, "I need roommates," and I shrugged.

~-B-~

I was done working for the day, and I walked down to the stairs towards the elevator.

I spotted Derek in his daily life clothes, and I looked at mine. I was wearing a sweater, and dark jeans with black boots.

His clothes screamed rich, and mine's...not. I shook my head.

He spotted me, "So. It's intense...this thing I have for, ah, ferry boats I mean." He smiled cheekily, and I smirked.

There are some lines that are way too dangerous to cross. I refused to give in, even if I know why I could give in. This is not my real life, but it's whatever so I'm not going to give in.

"I'm so taking the stairs this time." My voice turned mischievous once I walked past him, "No self-control. It's sad. Really." He called after me, right before I opened a door that led to staircase.

No self-control my ass. I scoffed, but I smiled.

Today was a good day.