Chaos //PHAN

Chapter 7

The loud ringing of the bells signifies the end of Dan’s classes for today, he carefully inserts all of his things inside his bag and then slung it on his back. When his professor walks out of the door, Dan followed suit using the other door in their classroom. The amount of students crowding the corridor is nauseating and the loud chatter of everybody is deafening. Everyone is engulf on their own little world to care for some student that their bags and shoulders are bumping, nobody even got angry whenever they got pushed accidentally, it looks like the students have an unspoken rule about it.

He is taking all of his sweet time to walk, his steps are painfully slow even with someone is quite pushing his back. When Dan reached the ground floor and he is now in an open space where bodies aren’t in the degree of rubbing on each other, Dan pulls out his phone to check for any new messages, he got none. He sighed and went to his locker. He picks up his necessary textbooks for tomorrow and shoves the unnecessary ones back. When his hand picked up his calculus book, he remembered the time Phil went to their flat and tutored him about his lessons and when Phil walked out, Dan tried to answer the page Phil mentioned and he cannot believe how his mind works the process easily. Oh how he wished that all of those maths are easy like that.

Dan checks his watch. He is ten minutes late already.

He pushed pass the crowd and walks to the engineering building, he took the elevator up until third floor and went straight to the library, the corridors aren’t that crowded and Dan assumed that it isn’t the time for the students on this floor for their break or to go home. Dan immediately spotted Phil standing in front of the library, he is leaning on the wall and his hand and eyes are quite busy looking and scrolling on his phone. Dan stand awkwardly at the safe distance away from Phil, will he say hi, or maybe shout at him or maybe tap him on the shoulder like a casual mate. His plans all crumbled when Phil raised his head and stare at Dan’s direction for absolutely five seconds and then he stands straight, walks towards Dan without breaking an eye contact and grabs his shoulder, “come with me.” Phil demanded. Dan stumbles, follows Phil and didn’t say anything.

They’re going upstairs, Dan didn’t explored the whole engineering building but he swear to himself that wherever they’re going it is probably the fucking roof deck. “Phil, wait” Dan halted on the flight of stairs. Phil did the same and looks back at him, “we’re going to the roof deck, right?”

“Your level of processing things seems to be damaged. Of course we’re going to the roof deck, it is quite obvious.” Phil crossed his arms and stare down at Dan

Dan looks hesitant to follow him, he isn’t really in the good terms with Phil so why is he bothering to follow him up until this point, he can ditch Phil from the start, but he didn’t. God damn it, “isn’t that place off limits to the students? And why do we need to go there?”

Phil stuffs his hand on his pocket and dangle a single key in front of him, “not off limits to the astrology something organisation.” Dan noticed how Phil avoided the other question, “if you’re thinking why I have a key, it’s from a friend.” Phil stuffs the key back on his pocket, “you coming or what?” Phil smiles and he quickly masked it with a poker face.

“Murder is illegal.” Dan said.

Phil blinks his eyes rapidly, tilt his head and he cracks up, “murder? Really, you think I’ll murder you in school grounds, I am not that stupid.” He dramatically wipes off a tear that slid out of his eye. “I’ll head up.”

Dan is contemplating whether he’ll go with him or just went down. He is curious about the roof deck though, he knows that ‘curiosity killed the cat’ but on whatever reason, he followed Phil.

The door is slightly ajar; the orange hue of sunset is spilling on the crack. All of Dan’s hesitations have been swept away at the same time the wind gently blows towards his direction, his hair ruffles and he hastily put a hand over it. He saw Phil on the side of the door, he is leaning back (again), his eyes are closed and there’s this innocent smile plastered on his face. He looks peaceful. The bastard, self-centered fucker image is completely gone, Dan feels like he is looking at the complete opposite of Phil.

Phil opens his eyes; the colour of his eyes complemented the colour of the sunset. Dan blinks and averts his gaze on other direction. He really has weakness towards beautiful eye colours.

“About that murder thing you’ve mentioned.” Dan stiffened, he sheepishly glance at Phil. Phil is walking towards him and Dan unconsciously backs away, “the truth is,” Phil trailed off, he looks into Dan’s eyes, he clenched his fists and squared his shoulder, he doesn’t know what to say to Dan.

“Look I-” Dan was cut off when Phil slammed his hands on Dan’s either side, Dan’s body jerks and his eyes are wide. He now feared his life would be disastrous after this, “sorry.” Dan mumbled.

“I am not picking a fight at you. Okay?” Phil remembered what Mrs. Pond said to him earlier and he is literally trying his best not to choke Dan at the moment, “and, also,” Phil gulps, he is bad at playing a good student to someone he dislike, “damn it,” he murmured and grabs Dan at his collar, “I can’t. Okay Dan, don’t fuck with me because I swear, I will freaking…” He stopped and slowly moves Dan into the wall, he moves his face inches apart from Dan. “I am currently in a contract to not slam someone on the wall and bash their face.”

Dan is lost on his own world, he is looking at Phil’s eyes and he wanted to squeeze Phil’s face especially when he is really close to him at the moment. Phil jerks his body using his collar and Dan snapped out of his trance and he just realise that he is really in a not really good situation. Phil is infuriating, his brows are knitted together and he is glaring daggers at Dan.

Perhaps Phil still didn’t realise on how compromising their positions are, or maybe Dan is the only one thinking about things like that.

“Phil, why are you angry with me?”

Dan has a point. Why is he angry at Dan? Aside from their first encounter which ended up two of them near on their throats (and Phil accepted the fact that it is his fault, his conscience can’t take it) and knowing Dan is gay, he cannot think of any other reason why he is angry with Dan. He dislikes gay, or maybe he dislikes them because he didn’t know why they are like that. His mind is filled with questions, resulting for more questions even he cannot answer.

Phil wanted to be liked by everybody; in fact, everybody wants to be like by everybody. No one in their right mind would want someone to hate them, so if Dan is one of the everybody, why did he come out of his hiding considering the awareness of all people towards the jeer of the society around homosexuals. Maybe he is angry at Dan because Dan is not in the everybody circle, because Dan is different and even though Dan is different, people doesn’t really hate him.

That is not fair.

He did his best to be liked.

“Phil?”

Phil glance up into Dan’s eyes, “what?” He balled his fist and raises it in mid-air.

Dan’s internal alarms set off, all of his senses are telling him that Phil is going to punch him square in the face and he is still pinned on the wall with Phil’s other hand on his collar. He needs to do something to save his face.

Dan raises his hands up into Phil’s cheeks and he pulls Phil’s face into his, crashing their lips together and their nose bumping in the process. His lips are tightly locked and so as Phil’s. He can feel Phil’s body tensing up; his grip on his collar loosening and his fist on mid-air is forgotten on his side. And then there’s movement, not movement coming from Dan, but a movement coming from Phil. Dan felt Phil’s mouth opening and a wet tongue traveled on his bottom lip, Dan hesitantly moves his mouth open and Phil’s tongue is shove immediately on his mouth.

Phil quickly shove Dan away and his face is red up until his ears.

Dan took the chance to run away.