Chapter One: It's Okay

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Circa June 2002

|Kat|

Oh my god, there he is.

Paul told me he was coming back, but I still wasn't ready for it when I first saw him.

The man who changed my life forever.

His back was turned to me, but Paul and I made eye contact. I shot him a look he knew well. If he sent Shawn over to me, I was going to end that man.

I sat at a table facing away from them. I came to catering to relax, not be this tense. I tried to calm down. Maybe he wouldn't see me. Maybe Paul knew what was good for him and would keep his mouth shut.

Maybe not.

I sucked in my breath as he came into view. As soon as we made eye contact, my heart dropped into my stomach. The one person I told myself I never wanted to see again was standing before me.

What do you say to someone you haven't spoken to in four years? What do you say to someone that once was your everything, but now means nothing to you? What do you say to the father of your little girl, who doesn't even know she exists?

"Kat, I..." It was oddly comforting that he didn't know what to say either.

"I'm glad you kept the cowboy hat," I ended up blurting out. I had to say something, anything, to break that tension. "It's a good look."

Those blue eyes that once brought me to my knees didn't leave me. He grinned and took a seat across from me.

"You look... different. Good different." He cleared his throat, like he couldn't believe he said that. "How'd that happen?"

I knew I looked different from the last time he'd seen me. I filled out a little more, I gained muscle, and well, I got older. "I grew up," I retorted. "It happens."

Having a kid helped there, too.

I didn't mean to be so cold, but what else could I say?

He nodded towards my breasts, but didn't say anything. I crossed my arms over them.

"I wouldn't worry about those. They aren't real," I admitted.

"Ah. I see."

He looked different, too. Older, wiser. His hair was shorter.

Time changes a person.

"Shawn, I'm not the naive little girl I was four years ago," I told him. "I've changed. I've moved on, made a life for myself."

"I get that." He reached over and held one of my hands. Out of shock and curiosity of what he would do next, I let him. "Look, I'm so sorry for how I treated you. You deserved so much better. I missed you-"

He was interrupted by the shouts of "Mommy, Mommy!". Our hands flew apart as my daughter climbed into my lap.

Our daughter.

Leslie stumbled in after her, clearly exhausted. "Little tyke got away from me," he chuckled lightheartedly.

He walked over and gave me a kiss on the cheek. "Who's this?" he asked, referring to the man sitting across from me.

"Um..." Looking at Shawn, I didn't know where to begin. There was so much I could say about him. "This is Shawn, my ex."

Leslie glanced at Scottie, and then back up at me, asking his question without wording it.

I nodded in answer. Yes, this is her father.

"Howdy, Leslie Tyler. Kat's boyfriend." He held out his hand for Shawn to shake.

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