WWE and Other Wrestling Promotions Fan Club

Go Home, Raw. You're Drunk.

Holy crap on a cracker. The go-home show for Raw was, as expected, amazing. But there were some parts that made everyone do a facepalm.

Case in point - the cheating angle that they decided to use with Daniel Bryan and Brie Bella to generate heat for the Stephanie vs. Brie match. All together now in your best Miz impression - "Really? Really? Really? Really?" I was on the internet the other day and I noticed some comments about this angle - a lot of TNA fans and other members of the IWC have compared this storyline to the Claire Lynch storyline that happened with AJ Styles (idk what went down because I don't watch TNA). Anyway, Megan Miller is apparently Daniel Bryan's physical therapist who has allegedly been having an affair with him. Um, what? 

So, anyway, Brie came out there, slapped the taste out of "Megan"'s mouth (her real name is Chelsea Green and according to wrestlinginc.com, she's trained under Lance Storm and has worked some house shows recently) and applied a beautiful "Yes!" lock to Stephanie.

Other highlights include two rhyming sessions! One by Paul Heyman, which, let's face it, Paul Heyman is the god when it comes to promos and one by Paige, which was hilarious haha :)

Roman beat RybAxel. Yawn. But he should have a good match against Randy Orton this Sunday at SummerSlam. Oh, and Corporate Kane's back. Meh.

Alright, who wants Dean Ambrose to pop out of a box for their birthday/Christmas present? Everyone? Ok, then. That's exactly what happened when Dean decided to hide in one of Hulk Hogan's birthday presents when Seth Rollins beat RVD. Seth kind of gave it away when he started acting paranoid, though. I knew Dean was in the big box when he started doing that. Dean popped out of the box, much to the delight of the fangirls and beat the holy hell out of Seth, sending Mr. Money in the Bank running.

Jack Swagger beat Cesaro. Does this mean we're finally gonna get the rivalry we were promised with these two? Nope. 

Eva Marie pinned AJ Lee. Let that sink in. Eva Marie now has a shot at the Divas Championship. Granted, she only won because Paige skipped her way out there, distracting AJ. After AJ got pinned, Paige decided to recite a little poem for her best friend, sending AJ into a fit and she ended up beating the red out of Eva Marie.

John Cena delivered a flawless promo that sent everyone marking out. If you didn't mark out when Cena talked about his heel turn, you're lying. I am a huge Cena fan and I really hope that he does turn heel or something! 

Brie got arrested. Yawn. Seriously, Steph? 

Slaters gonna slate, babay! Heath Slater continued his winning ways by beating Dolph Ziggler! Of course, he had Miz's help. I want Dolph to punch Miz in the face so bad, like seriously. 

Randy Orton beat Sheamus with a beautiful mid-air RKO.

The WWE Universe celebrated Hulk Hogan's birthday and I marked out so hard! In the ring, there was Jimmy Hart and "Mean" Gene announcing the Hulkster. When Hulk came out, the WWE universe erupted in loud cheers and chants, making me bawl like a little baby and I'm sure Hulk shed a few tears too. That's when they delivered a beautiful birthday video with Bob Dylan's "Forever Young" playing in the background.

That's when the marking out started. They brought out Ric Flair (I was kind of hoping Charlotte was at least on the ramp with the other Superstars and Divas), the "Hot Rod" Rowdy Roddy Piper, and "Mr. Wonderful" Paul Ordonoff, who stole a kiss from Nattie. Adorable. And my inner 90's child who spent her Monday nights watching WCW started marking out so damn hard, I thought I was gonna explode. The nWo came out there! Kevin Nash and Scott Hall came out there to that old song and holy shit, the roof blew off that arena. 

They walked down to the ring and Scott Hall delivered a promo that was amazeballs. Hulk tore off his red and yellow shirt to reveal the nWo shirt and everyone marked out (at least, everyone who knew who the nWo was - sorry! There are some kids who don't know, but they can find out for only $9.99! Sorry)

Kevin Nash was about to sing "Happy Birthday" to Hulk when Brock and Paul crashed the party. I know those guys in the ring were old as dirt, but I was really hoping one of them would clock Brock - like Piper or Hulk or hell, even Scott Hall with his thirsty ass self - no seriously, check his Twitter. The thirst is strong with that man.

Luckily, John Cena came out there to save the day, even though no one got in a fight (dammit!). The party continued on the WWE Network (which I need to go watch - I didn't get a chance to watch it yet). 

So that was the go-home edition of Raw. What will Summerslam have in store for the Superstars and Divas? Well, you'll just have to order the WWE Network, now available in over 170 different countries for only $9.99! (yes, I'm now trolling - hey, if Trips can do it, why can't I?)

What'd y'all think? Comment!