I swiftly walked down the long hallway, passing people and turning my head to avoid anyone seeing me cry. The last thing I wanted was for any other guests or hotel staff stopping to ask if I was alright.
Wiping the mixture of tears and makeup on the sleeve of my jacket, I was sure that I was quite the sight. I pressed the button for the elevator and covered my face in my hands, praying that when the doors opened, it would be empty.
Thankfully, it was and I let out a sigh of relief, peeking around the corner one last time to see that his door was still closed. Feeling defeated and lost, part of me died inside. He didn't even try to come after me and tell me that I was wrong about him or defend himself in any way. My bottom lip trembled, and all I wanted to do was get to my room as fast as possible so that I could stand in the shower and cry it out.
I boarded the small compartment and the doors closed. Did I do the right thing? Was I too quick to judge him and his intentions? It sickened me that he still had control over some of my thoughts. 'Stupid!' Why was part of me so fast to defend this guy? How can I rationalize what he just did to me? What's wrong with me? Nobody should ever have to endure that bullshit. I'm just an idiot who didn't learn her lesson the first time.
I stepped off of the elevator and for the first time ever, actually considered going to Luke with my resignation. How can I possibly work with Jared so close by? No matter what, it would most certainly affect my job. My mind was actually entertaining these idiotic thoughts. I could always go back to work for the hotel, surely my old boss would take me back in a second.
Sliding the key card, I walked into my room and fell onto the bed. The memories of who I was ten years ago bombarded my brain. I once again felt like this stupid, naive young woman who actually believed that this man that I've held up on a pedestal, had feelings. 'God, I can't believe I just did that. I just told Jared Leto off! And I have to face him tomorrow.'
I peeled the jacket and my clothes off on the bathroom floor. Turning on the hot water in the shower, I knew that I just needed some time to myself. I stepped under the hot stream, not moving for the longest time until I pressed my back against the tile and slid down. Hugging my knees, I cried until I couldn't cry anymore. I felt sick to my stomach, but finally had to get out. Standing upright, I cleaned myself and washed my hair.
I finally turned off the water and got out, wrapping my wet hair in a towel and my body in another. Just as I closed the bathroom door, I heard a voice outside. "Jen, I will knock all night if I have to. I'll even go get my guitar and play until either you open up or someone calls security. Come on, five more minutes, please."
I wondered how long he had been knocking because I couldn't hear anything over the running water. I opened the door and saw that he was fully dressed and had his hair in a messy bun. "Hi." He said softly.
"What do you want?" I tried to sound just as confident as I had when I went to his room. He looked up and down my body and I remembered that I was in a towel.
"Five more minutes and I swear if you don't like what I have to say, I'll leave and not bother you anymore. I promise."
I stared up at the ceiling and pursed my lips together. "Wait here so I can get dressed." Without allowing him a response, I closed the door in his face. Maybe I'm a fool, but I was relieved that he came to talk. I quickly dressed in pajamas and opened the door to find him leaning on the wall, just waiting patiently. Letting him in I closed the door behind him. "Ok, five minutes." Again, I set the timer on my phone.
He began pacing and looking at the floor. "I thought a lot about what you said to me. Nobody has ever spoken to me like that before. I am honestly sorry that I hurt you and I don't know what I was thinking." He stepped closer to me but not in a stalking manner like earlier. "Jennifer, I realize that sorry doesn't make it all go away, but I can't take it back either." He looked me in the eyes and I could see that he meant what he was saying. "You didn't deserve to be treated that way, and I cannot apologize enough."
"Who was she?" I wanted to know, but then again, I didn't.
"Just a girl that I knew would drop everything for my call. I intentionally chose her because I knew that she would stay around to annoy you the next day." He watched the anger in my face as he spoke. "Look, I'm being totally honest with you. I'm not trying to hurt you, but I want to get it all out."
I turned away and wiped my eyes. "You don't have to explain everything. It's not like I was your girlfriend or anything. It's just about respect, Jared."
He grabbed my arm and turned me around. "Respect or not it was mean and spiteful. You're right about me, when I don't get my way I act like a child. I'm just not used to being told no and I don't like it. Just give me one more chance to prove to you that I can treat you the way you deserve to be treated." He caressed my cheek with his hand. "I promise not to fuck it up again. Please."
The hand that was touching my face slid around the back of my neck and tilted my head back. I let him kiss me and melted into his arms. Was I the biggest idiot on the planet? Was I setting myself up for an even harder fall next time? The feeling of his lips on mine blurred out almost all of the negative thoughts and my body relaxed against his.
I wrapped my arms around his neck and let him push me down onto the bed. The little spark of electricity spread throughout my body as he kissed me. I clung to him with desperation and I wanted this feeling to end. The urgency in his kiss made me want him so badly and I we both jumped when my alarm went off.
"Ok, my five minutes are up and the last thing I want to do is break your rules, so I better go." He let go of me and got up, moving swiftly off the bed. Walking to the door, he stopped and looked back at me before placing his hand on the doorknob. "Have a good night, Jen. Thanks for hearing me out."
I picked up my phone to silence it and tossed it back on the table. "Jared, I don't want you to go." I was still leery of him, but I wanted to believe he was being truthful.
I walked to him and threw my arms around his neck, kissing him just as he had kissed me. He turned me so that my back was against the door. His hands trailed down my sides to lift me without breaking the kiss. Fuck! The way his mouth, lips, and teeth felt on my neck sent a shiver down my spine.
I could feel his hardness pressing into me as his hips moved over my skin. God, I wanted him. He kissed me again and I moaned into his mouth, making him grind his body harder against mine. Jared broke the kiss long enough to allow us both to catch our breath and I began to slide my hands under his shirt, raising it. "Let's try something different." His words made me nervous, but I nodded in agreement.
Jared tugged the shirt over his head and quickly pulled me by the hands over to the bed. I yanked my pajama top off.
Hands moved roughly over my flesh, squeezing and kneading. I rubbed my hand over the bulge in the front of his pants and his hands moved away from me, but only long enough to shove them down his hips. He pulled me into a kiss and the second my hand wrapped around him, I could feel the smirk widening on his lips.
Pushing me backward onto the mattress, he kneeled next to my body, wrapping his hand around my wrists, and pinning them tightly over my head. Holding me there, the devilish grin on his face made my brain go into overdrive. His free hand slipped inside my pajama bottoms. He teasingly ran his fingers along the waistband of my panties a few times before sliding under those as well. "Look at me!" He demanded.
His fingers traced my slit. When I thought I was going to lose my mind, he finally pushed them into me with ease. His thumb circled my clit and my hips moved with his fingers. Gasping, my fingernails dug into his hand as he brought me to the edge really fast.
His eyes narrowed and he laughed sarcastically as he pulled his fingers away, denying me of what I was so desperate for. "I have an idea, let's play a game."
