In Two My Heart Breaks-In A Heartbeat

Let me in

This chapter has spoilers for the Novel "Looking For Alaska- By John Green" so if you plan on reading the book I apologize in advance.  

Jonathan's P.O.V

Yes,it's true

I'm sorry but...

I know I'm not myself anymore
Don't ask me why I won't tell
It's hard to......even think straight anymore
Again
I'm sorry...

Sherwin's P.O.V
I was in the library after school, reading The Fault In Our Stars- By:John Green, after a few minutes
I went in a corner deep in the back of the library to finish it- but I ended up shedding a few tears for the incredibly heartbreaking ending. I glanced to my right and noticed- Jonathan? I haven't seen him in ages; he was reading the same book he was always reading-Looking For Alaska-another book by John Green; I wonder what it was about that book that made him never tire of reading it, i wanted him to notice me, for him to snap out of whatever was keeping him from being- Jonathan, I wanted him to let me in tell me what was wrong. He then looked up from his book as if someone was eavesdropping on my thoughts and answering them, and then he locked eyes with me for the first time in what seemed like years...and,he smiled a full genuine smile.

"Hi" I said hoping to start a conversation
Jonathan-Hey
Sherwin- I-I've read that book; what is it about it that makes you keep on re-reading it?
Jonathan- I want to know what happened to Alaska- I mean I know what happened but....why??
Sherwin -.....I don't know....no body does, not even the author himself( I said thinking back to an interview with John Green I saw a while back)
Jonathan-that's exactly why I need to find out- I'll go through this book a million times if I have to
And he grinned- this wide, shiny grin.

I scooted closer to him
Sherwin- you know I miss you.
( I instantly regretted that- I mean it was TRUE but....embarrassing) I-I mean you never talk anymore, and I'm sure people are worried about you, I'm worried about you.

Jonathan bLuSheD
and just said " I feel...different around you,like I don't have a care in the world, and I can tell you anything," he smiled, then his smile turned into a frown...then he let out a long, heavy sigh...like he was exhaling all his troubles and memories and thoughts and trying to be liberated from them.
"My" he took a long pause
"My sister died" his voice breaking and a few far tears rolling down his face.
" the same way Alaska did, and I thought...maybe- just maybe if I figured out what happened to Alaska- I can find out what happened to Ariana.
He broke out into tears and it broke my heart- he hugged me quite unexpectedly. "I'm sorry" I wasn't sure if it was aimed at me....or at someone else. And he just kept on saying over and over again " I'm so,so sorry"

567 words I apologize I just thought this was a great way to end cause I'm mean >:3