need you | g.d.

14 - we're back

kiara - saturday

i wring my hands together, my nerves racing through every part of my body as i'm lined up with the camera in front of me. this is the real deal; no live streams, or instagram and snapchat stories, this is going on youtube for every soul to see.

grayson moves the lights around as ethan focuses the camera on me. my eyes dart back and forth from each of them as they continue to set up.

we decided for this video it would be best to wait to introduce bailey than to throw her right in the fans' faces on the first run. that's why she's taking a nap while we try to do this as efficiently and quickly as possible.

ethan and grayson come around to the side of the camera that i'm on. gray sits next to me grabbing my thigh to help calm me down. i give him a shy smile. ethan presses a button and flips the screen on the camera before walking over to the couch where grayson and i are sitting.

  the camera's red light blinks a few times before a beep goes off, signaling that it was recording. i freeze and try to force a smile but end up looking like an idiot in the monitor that reflects our image.

"well," grayson glances at ethan and then me. "we're back!"

"no, grayson, we're supposed to say it at the same time," ethan argues shaking his head.

their jokes and bickering seem to calm me down for some reason.

  "guys, as you can see, we have a special new guest," grayson refers to me, only halfway introducing my presence.

  ethan looks at me as grayson looks at me; the same time to be exact. i look down to my lap, not knowing which one to look at first.

  then something i dread and fear the most happens and i dart my gaze to grayson. i go to stand up but ethan puts his hand on my shoulder telling me to sit. he leaves the room and walks down the hall towards grayson's bedroom to stop the crying baby that interrupted our video.

  gray stands up and cuts the camera, stopping the recording and sitting back down next to me.

  "we'll just cut that out, okay?" he tells me, placing an arm around my shoulder and pulling me in close.

  he kisses my cheekbone, backing away and whispering in my ear, "they'll understand. i love you, kiara, so much."

  i crane my neck so my forehead is against his. "i love you, too, grayson."

  "okay," he stands up, clapping his hands. "let's get this shit show on the road."

  i smack his shoulder and he smirks, bending down and planting a kiss on my lips.

  "i'm just kidding," he mumbles as he hits the record button again.

  he plops back down into the seat with me and i giggle, quickly dismissing it when i remember he is recording. his hand finds my thigh again placing itself right in the middle.

  "so," grayson drags out the word far too long.

  i don't want to say anything.

  "the hate needs to stop. i don't care if you've been a fan for how ever many years, or even days for that matter, but you will be blocked if the the hate continues," grayson's voice comes out strong and stern, but not too harsh. "you guys are my family, just like kiara is my family and family doesn't discourage each other. i'm done seeing all the rude and hateful comments that are left on kiara's social media. i love you guys and i'm so thankful for all the support but i love kiara, too, and there's nothing you can do to change that."

  my heart melts in that second and i try not to break down in tears.

"babe," grayson nudges me out of my starstruck trance. "you wanna say something?"

his voice stays low as he asks me and i can't help but focus in on his words, my face contorting to the idea.

"just say something quick and easy," he guides me along.

i violently shake my head. "there's nothing to say, gray."

he pulls my body towards him and i glance back towards the camera well aware that we're still recording. his arm hooks itself around my waist and now i'm propped on his lap.

"i love you," he whispers into my hair before squeezing my hip.

i grab onto his jaw and plant a kiss right on the hollow of his cheek, the skin smooth and soft. abruptly, i stand up and hit the stop button on the camera. this video was just getting too up-close-and-personal for my liking.

"can we just edit that portion and get it posted before i start to second guess myself, please?" i ask, whining a little because of how anxious i am.

grayson stands up and walks closer to me. "we need to finish it up with a story time thingy, like how we met and how, you know, bailey happened."

i snort. "i'm not telling them about our sex life, g, that's just weird."

he throws his hands up with a laugh. "oh my god, kiara, that's not what i'm asking you to talk about and you know that. i'm just saying we should tell them how our relationship started and then how you left me."

i frown at this and guilt pangs against my chest as i look down to the ground. grayson's hands land on my shoulders.

"listen, we just need to tell them the basics and then we can turn our channel into one of those cute family channels, you know?"

  the way grayson talks about our future makes me really hopeful. and then something occurs to me.

  "what about ethan?" i ask and it seems like a light switch was flipped on inside grayson's head.

  "ethan never really enjoys youtube like he says he does. it really stresses him out but he tries to hide it for the sake of our fans. he loves them, he really does, just life seems to get him down sometimes. so, with that being said, i don't think he would mind taking a break or even longer for that matter."

  "what about your fans?" i ask, wondering how they would react to ethan leaving.

  he sighs. "hopefully, they would understand."

a/n: the next couple of chapters are gonna be slow but i promise i have some drama (ish) in store for this story lol k bye ly
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-el