Love Me.

Chapter 3

LENNON.

"Ugh, why did I let you guys drag me here." I sighed.

My brothers thought it would be a good idea to force me to this after party since I never attend them. According to them, these parties are "sick" and "rad". To me these parties were just a waste of time. I mean, we just had an award show. Isn't that enough for one night? What are these after parties even for? Celebrating the winners? Well we can do that on our own, somewhere else.

"Because after parties are fun." Cruz smiled.

I rolled my eyes and followed them to our seat. My bladder then decided it was full, so I excused myself to go to the bathroom.

"You better not run away." Jared teased.

"Why would I? You guys stole my car keys." I rolled my eyes.

"We had to or else you wouldn't have come." Noah chuckled. I rolled my eyes for like the thousandth time and walked away.

Since I had never been to this party hall before, I had no idea where the bathrooms were. I groaned and walked through the crowd of celebrities as I tried to find an usher.

"Lennon!" I heard someone shout. I turned around and saw Selena Gomez walking towards.

Gosh, my bladder was really pushing against my stomach.

"I'm so glad you came." she said giving me a hug.

"Yea, I was forced to attend this by my brothers." I laughed.

"Typical brothers." she rolled her eyes. "Anyway, how are you? Have you been doing good?"

Selena was just an incredible friend. Despite how different we are, we always have this connection where we can talk about literally anything. She's probably the only friend I have since almost all of Hollywood are some fake bitches.

"I'm good." I replied. She looked around before grabbing my wrist and pulling my sleeve up. Her eyes landed on a fresh slit across my wrist.

She frowned and quickly pulled me away from everybody. I was about to ask where we were going but she suddenly pulled me into the bathroom. Finally!

"Len, you promised you wouldn't." she sighed as we stood in front of the stalls.

"Selena." I began. "I know but-"

I cut myself off and ran inside a stall, quickly undoing my pants. "I really have to pee!"

Relief filled inside me once I finished urinating. Gosh, I had such a full bladder. Must've been all that water I drank earlier before my performance.

"Okay, so you were saying?" I stepped out of the stall and washed my hands.

"I said why did you do it again?" She crossed her arms.

"Because, Selena, I'm a failure. I'm stupid and I'm a bitch just like they all say." I calmly said as I dried my hands.

I always had problems with people bullying me. I hated it how every single day and night I was attacked on social media by all these haters and all these magazines and news reporters that made up so many shit about me. I was in a state of depression and anxiety and the only way I felt better was to slide a razor against my wrists or just get really drunk. Because whenever I got drunk, I forgot about everything for a while and I would actually feel happy and bubbly like I should be. But that bubbly and happy Lennon is gone just because some people don't know when to shut their mouths or they don't even care that I am just a normal person like them who also has feelings.

I just wanted to be happy, ya know? I wanted to feel normal again like way before my career started. Sometimes I even find myself wishing I was never famous or that I'd never been born into a famous family but then I rethink and I say to myself that this is a blessing because so many people would die to be in my position but actually if I were them I'd just stick to being whoever I was because my life is not all that great. It can be happy at times but most of the time I'm just living in complete hell.

"Len, stop it. You are none of that and you know. You just won an award tonight and that's freaking awesome." Selena said.

"Yea, I know but winning awards doesn't-"

Her phone began to ring and I stood there quietly.

"Sorry, let me get this. Hello?" She stepped to the side.

I sighed and faced the mirror looking down at my outfit. When I performed, I had changed into a denim shirt, black jeans, and brown combat boots. Then I changed into a black long sleeve crop top, green skinny high waisted pants, and black pointed toe heels. This was the life of a celebrity at award shows, you changed like every hour unless you weren't performing or presenting.

"Len, I'm so sorry but I have to go. I was just called by my bodyguard that someone is at my house and won't leave until he speaks to me." she rolled her eyes.

"Justin?"

"Unfortunately."

I laughed and hugged her goodbye.

"Good luck."

She left and then I was all alone in the bathroom. I guess it was time for me to go out into the party then. I sighed and walked out the bathroom.

As I was about to turn the corner, I bumped into someone really hard.