zentropy | mileven.

⁸⁾ the ballad of john and yoko

[MIKE POV. ONE MONTH LATER.]

❝ you know it ain't easy, you know how hard it can be, the way things are going, they're gonna crucify me ! ❞

━ CHAPTER EIGHT.

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LIGHTS SCATTERED the air around us. it was as if gallons of dopamine filled the air, encircling our senses as my vision was hazy yet peaceful. things were just how they should be.

we held hands, and the feeling of warmth intertwined through my fingers. we were just running. holding hands. laughing like there wasnt a care in the world.

suddenly she grabbed my face with those dainty fingers, and pressed her lips towards mine. music filled the air and my heart lifted me into the clouds. we were flying.

and then slowly but surely, our lips gently pulled away.

my eyelids fluttered open. staring back at me were two brown chocolate dimes, with a curly lock of hair scattered in front of them.

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I woke up to the sound of my alarm clock in what seemed like a furious cold sweat. my dream was still there, lingering in my mind.
what the fuck was that?
I had expected to see two icy blue eyes freezing my functioning body as per usual. I had expected to have my fingers run through those fiery light locks instead of honey curls.
what the fuck was that?
I didn't expect to see jane in my dream.

I reasoned that dreams were always fucked up once in a while.

I laid my head back down on my pillow as my black curls tickled my face. my alarm clock shone the numbers "5:30 AM" at me. I still had a couple hours.

I stared up at my ceiling and mulled my dream once over in my brain.
perhaps it was just my subconscious telling me that distracting myself was the easiest thing to do to prevent myself from getting mad about max's outburst the other month.

we still hadn't talked since then.

but then my mind wandered over to jane.

images flashed through my head. seeing her curls bounce behind her as we chased each other down the halls. watching her eyes delicately close that night under the tree at the park. the two of us as kids, me waving at her and her smoky black eyeshadow and slicked back hair as she ignored me or laughed at me. the first time we talked. the first time she called me her best friend. how she was almost a foot shorter than me now. our first hug. holding hands during the party. arm wrestling. sarcastic banter. laughing until it felt like our stomachs were going to fall out. her eyes. her smile.

my heart was doing it again.

i could hear it thump so loudly and quickly from the blood rushing in my ears. and it felt as thought my entire body vibrated along to the beat in a sleepy dazed state.

this is ridiculous. stop thinking about her like that. she's your best friend. you like max.

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"I know for a fact that that's not the middle finger in China," jane protested, as I held up my pinky and insisted that doing so was the equivalent to flipping someone off in America.
"how would you know?" I laughed, holding my pinky closer to her face.
she chuckled as she smacked my hand away playfully and held her own pinky up.
"woah there," I warned sarcastically, "that's profanity. you should stop now before clarke sees."
"wow, I'm so scared," she said with a mimicking tone. I put up an actual middle finger to her face this time and she laughed harder, taking my middle finger in her grasp and twisting it down just enough to pull me down with it.
"oh, you wanna go?" I laughed as I took her own finger and twisted it down too, the both of us now in a state of playful wrestling once more.