He Imprinted On Me {Rewriting}

Chapter Four

The room has fallen silent once my mother and Billy had left, the sound of the old pickup could be heard leaving, gravel flying behind it. It honestly was odd, for Jacob to be so silent, even in a time like this. He woild be talking, calming those who needed it, or having a soft side conversation with someone. It was strange to me, to be in a room that was so silent, and I knew for sure that I didn't like it.

"She might be able to hear you right now." My grandmother said softly, fianlly breaking the silence. I could feel myself letting out a metal sign, thankful for her speaking up.

The broke silence didn't last long, as it fell quite once again. I could hear her soft foot steps before the sound of the door shutting and clicking into place. I heard Jacob as he let out a soft sigh, it was quite but could still be heard, there were a few foot steps before I felt him grabbing my hand and intertwining our fingers together. I wanted to tignten my grip on his hand, to let him know I was listening, to let him know I could hear, but my body wouldn't do it. I couldn't really move, even though I was trying my hardest. Tighten my grip, flutter my eyes, even to wiggle my toes, but nothing.

It was as if my body waa laughing at me, finding enjoyment in my struggle. It was the disorder, taking control, and it qas making sure that I was putting up a big fight to get control back. I always hated myself about this, even when I knew I couldn't control it, but now I hated myself even more. To put mt family through his, to cause them to worry, to cause Jacob to worry. It frlt selfish to me, and I knew I couldn't control it, but it's just how it is. I've had it for years, and could still have it the rest of my life, who knows.

"Madeline." Jacob had finally spoke up,  lightly running his thumb over the top of my hand. His tone was laced with fear, and it worried me, for more than one reason.

  He has never called me by my real name, no one has in years. I hear at the doctors, when they call for me, but even then the doctor calls me by Maddy. My mother has even rarely used by first name, and only when I'm huge trouble, and that rarely happens. I couldn't even imagine what woilf make him use my real name, there was even a small part of me thar didn't even think he knew my frist name, thinking that Maddy was my real name.

"I know, I promised to tell you, but I don't know how, that's the biggest thing. All I can tell you right now is, Bella is no longer in the picture. Edward moved back, and they got back together." He let out a nervous laugh, I could feel his body shake as he laughed, before it stopped and he became like a board. "And then the one thing I want- no I need to tell you, I can't. Sam, he won't let me, and it's killing me. I literally feel like a piece of me is dying, and your the only one that can fix it." He paused, I didn't know if he was just taking a breath or thinking of what to say. "Then what if I tell you now and you can't hear me? It'd all be for nothing, but what if this the only chance I'll ever get. Maddy-." He got cut off by the door opening, and loud foot steps.

"What did you tell her?" I heard Sam ask, his tone angry as you could almost her a growl in his voice. His voice had sounded deeper than the last time I remember hearing in, but that had been so long ago, and he had gone through that change. 

Jacob let go of my hand and I heard the chair he was sitting in move back, hitting my bedside table with a thud. I suddenly missed his warm touch, feeling that was the only thing I could feel. I wanted to reach out to him, and grab onto his hand, not wanting him to let go. It was the frist time he has held my hand since we were little kids, and I wanted to hold it again.

"I didn't tell her anything! You won't let me!" Jacob basically yelled at him, but I could tell he was trying to keep his voice down, but failed. "It's sucks ass! You know that?"

"She can't know!" Sam replied, seeming to be able to keep his voice at a normal tone, but the anger was there, but it was slowly going away. "You know she can't!"

"She need to know!" Jacob was able to lower his tone, but I could tell he was still angry, even if he was trying to mask his tone. "She deserves to know!"

"Why does she need to know so badly Hmm, why do you keep forcing this argument? I told you no, you should drop it!" Sam had moved closer, I want to guess that he had gotten closer to Jacob, maybe even in his face. "Why? Why do you keep bringing it up?"

"Because." Jacob paused, lowering his voice, the anger was suddenly gone. "I imprinted on her." His voice was soft, and carring once again, the tone of voice that I always loved to hear him use.

I wanted to open my eyes. I wanted to do something. At least do anything at this point, I was begging for my body to do anything. I could feel as if I was hyperventilating, but my breathing was perfectly normal and steady. On the outside I was perfectly normal, as if I was sleeping, but on the inside I was freaking out. I was wide awake, and I wanted to be up and moving. To let others know I was awake and there.

I was sitting in class, bored out of my mind, we had a sub, so it was loud. I was trying to work on the papers the teacher left for us, but that was no use.  There were other students from different classes coming in, acting if it was just a free period. It was getting louder, but it wasn't like it was going to bother any other class around us. The walls were sound proof, so I was stuck with this, because the sub wasn't going to calm them down.

The sub was the mother of one of the students in class, and it was mainly her son's friends that were the ones coming in. There was no chance of getting to leave, becuase even as one that just wanted to do their work, I wasn't popular, so I would have to stay. I also didn't want the chance of getting a note left for me, becuase who knows what she would put on it.

I was rubbing my sweat off my hands and onto my jeans, scratching the top of my hand. My mother had brought me a fidget cude, to help with my stress and anxiety, but one of the guys had took it fiddle cube, and I know that I wasn't getting it back. It wasn't like that was an odd thing either, so far that was the third one I lost this year. It was only the second month into my Sophomore year, and I don't think I could go home and tell my mom I lost another one. I can't even tell you how many I lost last year, becuase at one point I had just given up on getting them or taking them to school.

Putting all my stuff in my bag, I sat it on top of my desk once it had been fully zipped. It wasn't like I was going to be able able to work, I knew that, so why not have my stuff ready for when class was finally over. Taking in a deep breath, I stood to my feet and slowly walked over to the group of guys that had been causing most of the nose. I looked at the one in the middle, feeling my heart beat echo in my ears, but I tried to remain calm on the outside. He was one of the most popular guys in school, he was a great athlete, that's why he was one of the most popular people.

"Paul, can I please have my cube back?" I looked at him and they all got quite. They stared at me like I was a child, and I was starting to feel like it.

"Why should I?" He questioned with a smirk before twirling it around in his hand. "I like it, and you always seem to get a new one."

"I can't keep buying them, they get expensive. That the forth one I've had this year, and you and your friends keep taking them." He sighed and held it out in his hand.

"Alright, you want it?" As I reached out for it, he threw it to the other side of the room. "Go fetch." That's when his friends and himself started to laugh, taking joy in being mean to me.

"You're a real jerk, you know that? I hope you get what you deserve." I looked at him before going to look for my fiddle cube.

It was hard to be in classes with upperclassmen anymore, and even more when most of them I didn't get to have with Jacob. I was lucky and got to share some with Jared or Quill, and evem Leah in one. I guess those are the perks of being smart and being able to take higher classes.