The New Joker

Paralysis

I wake gasping for air and confused to what the hell happened. Someone was choking me and I couldn't move or let out a sound. I had to talk to my dad immediately so I went inside my head to reach him. I stood there and called out watching him appear. "Who the hell was that" "She is a demon that comes while your sleep and she manifests in the darkest corners of your mind" "The old hag disease right" "Smart boy but you have to let my death go I know it bothers you day in and day out" "I've been trying pops but it's hard and it sucks I wanted to spend more time with you" "You still are son I'm right here I'm not going anywhere be strong for me, your mother and most importantly yourself" "I got you pops" I embrace him and return to the world. As long as I know who I am and what I am capable of I have nothing to fear. I went to check on my mom for a moment then went back to my room. I got sleepy again from boredom so I decided to take a nap. I get a cold feeling over my body as I realize the spirit returned. It tried to hold me still but I was too strong . I know who I am and I know my power. It disappeared but it was a struggle but I'm victorious in the end. I had to regain my strength after that battle. I end up getting a call a while later... wasn't pleasant either. I got left by Angel and it devastated me so I just smoked blunts until I went to sleep. I woke up pissed off and now walked with a cold look of anger on my face. My eyes lost the shine and went black and dull. I still went to school and graduated early and had some colleges looking for me to come to their school and they would pay for the scholarship. I decided to take a break from society and kept the offers though. I started struggling to gain my confidence I felt so low of and tried to live life. I still took care of business to keep money in the house. Eventually things got better though I started feeling alive again with a big smile and a knife in hand. I keep motivating myself to keep pushing cuz life ain't stopping for nobody so let's live it up. I have my mom and that's all I need to keep pushing(plus myself ofcourse). Some months past and I had a job where I met an interesting young lady one year younger than me. She was cute and came up to my stomach. As I talked to her more I grew a liking to her but I didn't wanna fall to fast so I took my time. I felt like it's best not to rush things in life so take your time, relax and let things fall in place. Keep yourself motivated and don't let anyone tell you who you are. Only you know yourself best people only can tell you from what they see cuz they don't know shit about you. If you keep that in mind you can overcome all obstacles in your way. I ended up taking her out on a date. She had a cute but she didn't think so and also doesn't like her own smile. When we left the restaurant I believe I changed all that. I dropped her off home she got out but there was a sad look on her face. I stepped out and walked to her and asked "What's the matter" she looked at me with a little pouty face and responded "I don't wanna go home". After a little silence I grabbed her and put her back in the car. I drove to my house and put her in the bed with me. She grabbed me and dug her face in my chest with a big smile. She fell asleep and I just wrapped my arms around her and stayed up. The sun came up and I tried to get up. She woke up and looked at me smiling. She sat up and I stood up out the bed stretching. She reached out to me and did hold her hands up to me. It was cute wanted to be picked up so I did and carried her to the kitchen with me. She helped me make breakfast and we chilled some more. We went to work on the same shift so we both got ready and I drove us to work. Later my depression kicked in hard and caused me to cut a smile in my face that looked identical to my dad's. I had gauls over them but I regenerated fast so the didn't stay long. I was used to the pain and felt numb to it. Shit hurts and trying to look at everything on the bright side is challenging. Mostly it because you don't how but look at it as a come up from where you started. The development you see in yourself can make a big difference to you. When other people notice it they can choose to try to take it from you or encourage you and help you boost it. Never give even you feel like you have nothing left keep pushing because you could have a lot more than you think. As long as you're patient and wait on it then it shall come. But I kinda let the dark thoughts so I put the gun to my head and gripped the trigger. To be continued...