A Heart of Stone with a Coat of Gold

New Moon

A year ago

"Do you wanna do it?" Nikhil asked her as they cuddled on his dorm bed.

She shook her head in denial.

"What's the problem?" He asked, a bit annoyed.

"Because I have to be at home in exactly 20 minutes or my parents will kill me" Anu replied as she pecked his cheeks. They both studied together. And they were both madly in love.

"I don't see the problem. We are both in love. Do you think I'm not the right person? And when will we do it? When my brilliant brainy girlfriend is studying at some hotshot institute in some godforsaken part of the country? "Nikhil ranted in mock annoyance.

Anu stared into his eyes ."Never say that. You are the right guy. Always will be."

"Then when? We have to do it at some point"

Anu's face contorted in concentration. Nikhil couldn't help but smile. "Ok, next weekend we meet and we do it. My family is leaving for some event at a relative's place. I would lie that I would be staying at Nisha's place to study." She replied in a solemn voice crossing her heart.

Nikhil held her face as he kissed her on the lips. Then Anu left. Nikhil, watched her leave, standing at the gate, seeing her figure in the corridor recede to the shadows. Then he launched himself on his bed, in glee, thinking about the next weekend.

He loved her. He truly loved her. And he knew she was the right girl.

Destiny gave a haughty smile. That weekend never came.

***********************************************************************************************

The sound of the door closing broke Anu from her reverie. Neel switched off the lights and turned on a bedside lamp that cast a pale hue on the walls. He had showered and changed into his night clothes. He ambled to the crib and stole a glance at the figure of his sleeping son, lightly caressing his soft hairs. Then he turned and sat across her on the other end of the bed.

Silence ensued. Anu's heart thumped wildly against her chest as she dreaded what was coming. Neel kept on staring at her as if expecting her to speak. When she said nothing, he, as if in resignation, he took out a cigarette and lit it.

He turned his head away and kept on smoking, lost in his own thoughts. When he finally spoke, his tone was soft and low. "I don't talk much.", He gave his declaration.

He again waited for her. Anu knew he was fighting a losing battle. He didn't talk but she did. In any other place, in any other situation, to any other person, she would have. But not to him. It was that simple.

Eventually, however, she would have to, she knew. Whether she wanted to or not. The little rebellion was meaningless.

"It isn't good," She said pointing to his hand.

"I know" came the curt reply and another puff of smoke.

"It's not good for the baby"

He stopped smoking and stared at her. Then he put out the cigarette on a nearby ashtray and crossed his hands across his chest.

He said nothing, and like a good wife she was supposed to be, she followed his lead. There were no more words to be exchanged. Only the act.

Neel finally checked his watch. "It's late. I have to leave early tomorrow."

It was a cold night. The bed was a large one and had a single blanket that was kept folded. Neel lied down and pulled up the blanket. Then he gestured her to do the same.

When Anu pulled up the blanket to her bosom, she inched as far as the possible from Neel. Both of them stared at the ceiling, eyes wide open, sleep miles away. The clock was ticking and Anu could hear the minutes pass by. Maybe tonight would be alright, she thought.

After an excruciatingly long moment, Anu felt movement near her. Her body turned stiff as she saw Neel edge towards her. He balanced himself on one of his elbows and with his other hand turned her face towards his.

He stared at her face as she felt his hand grasp her's under the blanket. He held them tightly and brought them close to his face. His coarse moustache brushed against her skin as he kissed them gently.

For the first time, she was seeing her husband up close. The lean face, and the slight wrinkles that you could only see from near. The black moustache with slight tinges of grey and the salt and pepper hair. His heavy quick breaths. And the blue eyes that twinkled even in the dark, laden with lust, not looking into her own, but at her young face, ready to devour her.

It was that at this moment Anu knew that she hated him. She knew he was not doing anything particularly immoral. He had not forced her. She had married him of her own will, whatever the circumstances. But still, she could not accept what was happening. She could not help herself hating this man. Her heart longed for someone else, for Nikhil, not for her husband who was soon going to use her body to satiate himself.

Still holding her hand, Neel inched his face closer to her. Anu knew what was coming. She shut her eyes. Her heart thumping against her rib cage, her hands sweating.

With a slight jerk, she felt Neel release her hand.

She opened her eyes. Neel's face had a bewildered expression. "Is this your first time?" His voice was gentle but still couldn't hide the disbelief behind them. She nodded. And then waited. All the while trembling.

Neel was shaking his head. He got up, picked his son from the crib and left the room.

***********************************************************************************************

He didn't come back for the night. Later when Anu got up to have some water from the kitchen, she saw him sprawled on the sofa, gently snoring, his hand covering his eyes, all the while, the little kid on his chest wide awake pulling at his moustaches.

She couldn't help smiling.

***********************************************************************************************
Please upvote and comment, only if you like the tale