A Heart of Stone with a Coat of Gold

Ice and Fire

Neel woke up the following morning early as usual. He decided he won't be going to the office, so he called and informed them of his absence. 

As he gazed at the morning sun, scenes of the last night flashed before his eyes. Anu's tormented face, the violin, Raghu's speech, all were dancing in front of his eyes, like scenes of a movie being played. When it all became too much he lit a cigarette.

He was smoking and skimming through the morning newspaper when he saw Anu standing beside him, her eyes red. He nodded that he had recorded her presence.

She glared at him for a few moments, and then asked in an icy voice, "The kids?"

"I will go and pick them up in a few hours." He answered in an equally cool and low tone.

He finally folded his newspaper and turned to her. "Sit." He gestured. "We need to talk."

Neel took in a deep drag, then let out a thick cloud of smoke. "You let me down yesterday."

"I let you down?" Anu snarled. She couldn't believe him. 

"The new VP's wife not able to say a few words in support of her husband. Is that the kind of wife you want to be? People are going to talk for ages about that. Have you thought of my reputation?" His head was down and he kept on smoking as he spoke.

"And what about the new VP who chickened out in front of them? Who put his wife in the line of fire to save his skin, without giving her so much as a hint? They should know that the man supposed to lead them, is a coward." Her months of frustration was coming out. When she had married him, she had let go of many of her beliefs and agreed to make compromises. But letting him play with her respect was something she never agreed upon.

"You will not talk to me like that." He raised his voice as he looked up. The morning sun shone brightly on his face, and she couldn't see his face.

"And who gave you the permission to talk to me like that?" Anu had had enough. She wouldn't bear him anymore. At the back of her mind, she was thinking far far away. I have my house, she thought at the back of her mind. But it's not enough, a small voice said to her.

"Well, I didn't want to state the facts. But let me do so." He said in a deep voice as he took another drag of the cigarette. "I am the man of the house and I earn. A lot." He took a deep breath and continued, "How much do you make? I have a Masters in Business,  you are a mere graduate." Another deep breath. "And lastly, I am the Vice President of a company. You are nothing. Nothing."

Tears started dripping down Anu's face. Neel's words were cold and bitter as ice. Each of them stung her and tore her apart piece by piece. He was saying the truth, an ugly truth, but the truth nevertheless. What had she got, compared to this man of stone, who like a statue towered above her?

He moved in closer and gave the final blow. "Become my equal and then talk to me in a loud voice." He blew the final puff of smoke on her face. 

He got up and turned his face away, "I have decided you will continue your studies. The entrance exams are a few months away. Start preparing. You will do your Masters. I will pay the fees."

"I don't need your charity." Her voice cracked as she spoke. Her spirit had vanished

"I am a banker, Anu. It is not a charity. It is an investment. To make you a wife that is worthy of me." He took a pause and then continued, "Now you are smart. It's a good investment, wouldn't you agree? " 

She was still facing his back and couldn't see his face. She wanted to know how he was feeling making her feel so small. But he still wouldn't face her.

 She got up and turned to leave. Before she left, she turned and said in a voice laced with all the fire she could muster. "I always wondered why Shruti left you. Now I know why. She was right. You are a stone."

But the man of ice just stood there, his face in the shadows, unmoving.

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Whenever Anu was sad, Ishan Bhaiyya used to cheer her up. But now there was no one to listen to. No one who could tell her what to do, and no pillar she could take the support of, and rest. All she had was she herself. "You are strong" Ishan's voice rang in her ears.

And then Neel's voice rang, "You are nothing". The cruelty of the man she had married, something she could not fathom. She had thought of him as a man who could not feel. But never as a man who could hurt her so much. She had been getting the signs that she was getting close to figuring him out. What had changed so much in a single day? Not a day, it had been a week, she had been gone for a week.

You are strong, Anu murmured to herself. And then it clicked.

Anu pulled out her phone. Her hands trembled as she called a person she hadn't talked to in ages, but her heart ached to. Thankfully the person picked up the phone.

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A week ago

"I can pay her fees easily," Neel told Nisha. "But would she accept? She wouldn't even take a few presents from me."

Nisha smiled, "That is Anu for you, Sir. Too proud for her own good."

Both of them sat in silence for a few moments. Finally, Nisha asked, "What would you do, Sir?"

 When he replied, his voice was loud and deep. "Do not worry. Her life wouldn't be a waste. This time the bird will fly out of the cage. I will make sure.  A man makes it sure.". Neel looked at her with his deep blue eyes, which glinted for an instant. Then it was gone.

At that time Nisha couldn't get the meaning of his words.

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 The present

She had figured everything out. Nisha told her everything. Anu was still furious with Neel. She couldn't forgive his actions.  But in her hearts of hearts she pitied him more.

 A man who wouldn't smile. A man who wouldn't cry. And a man who would rather put a charade than talk. Such a man is to be pitied. 

The evening sun was shining brightly. Neel was not in the living room. He must have left to bring the kids, Anu imagined. She went to his study table and saw a sheet, with a pen and a photo of  Shruti and Neel beside it. Her heart fell when she read the writing on the paper.

A man never bends,

A man never pleads,

And,

A man never cries.

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