Trusting Again (5SOS)

Fourteen

Savannah

I was back in America. I swore I would never come back to this terrible place even if it were to save my life. There were way too many memories and chances that everything I had worked to fix could be broken. I only wished that we wouldn’t be going back to Tennessee. I knew that a lot of acts who came to America left Tennessee out of their tour, but of course this had to be one of those rare occasions that they added Nashville to the tour. I hoped that no one from my past would be there. I was about the only 5SOS fan after all.

We were going to tour all of the larger cities before getting to the smaller ones. First up was New York! I couldn’t wait to see the huge city with the guys. When we landed it was really close to midnight, so we all raced to the hotel and crashed as soon as we got there. I actually took the time to change into pajamas and brush my teeth. I walked into the room with the beds and saw Luke and Michael face down on the beds with their limbs sprawled all over the beds, still in the clothes they wore on the plane.

I giggled to myself and walked over to Luke’s bed. I took off his shoes and pulled the cover up over him. He smiled slightly in his sleep and muttered a, “Thank you Savannah.”

“You’re welcome,” I whispered as I kissed his head. We always showed that we loved each other as siblings. The other guys looked at me like a sister and I looked at them as brothers. I then walked over to Michael and pulled his boots off of him. He rolled over in his sleep so I tried to take his rough flannel shirt off. He half way woke up and muttered a bunch of incoherent words. “Mikey, I can’t understand a word you just said, but I need you to sit up for a moment,” I whispered.

He sat up and I got the sleeves off of his arms before throwing the shirt on top of our bags. I lay down on the bed and pulled the cover over the two of us. His arm wrapped around my waist and pulled me closer to his chest. “I love you,” he mumbled into the back of my shoulder.

“I love you too,” I sighed as I entwined my fingers with his and fell into a deep sleep.

I woke up with a scream as the nightmare made an encore. Luke and Michael woke up instantly and Michael fell out of the bed. I just sat there with my knees tucked to my chest and my head in my hands. The dividing door slammed open as Ashton and Calum came running in the door. “What happened? What’s wrong?” Calum asked as he frantically looked around the room for some clue as to what happened.

I couldn’t talk. I couldn’t move. I couldn’t even cry. I was just sitting there in complete shock, staring at my feet. Ash sat in front of me while Calum and Luke sat on either side of me trying to get me to tell them what happened. Michael knew what was wrong and he knew just what to do. He got up off the floor and shooed the other boys out of the room. He sat down beside me and pulled me into his arms. I moved enough to wrap my arms around his neck as he started singing some of my favorite slow songs.

After a few songs I was out of shock enough to cry at least. I was bawling into his shoulder as he sat there telling me that it was just a dream, he wasn’t going to let anything hurt me, and anything that could count as comforting. I eventually stopped crying and we let the others back in. “What happened?” Ash asked as they all sat down on the bed.

“I had a nightmare. I’m sorry,” I said as I looked at the time. It was only three in the morning and I had woken them all up along with probably half of our floor. I just wanted to be invisible or turn into a ghost at this point.

“Don’t apologize, you couldn’t help it,” Luke said as he pulled me in for a hug. “Everyone has nightmares, its nothing to be ashamed of.” If only they knew what nightmares had gotten me.

“But I ended up waking you up at three in the morning and you all have a concert tonight.”

“Do you really think we care about that?” Calum laughed. “We were worried about you. We could have slept through any scream, but we thought something was wrong and had to make sure you were alright. We can’t let our little sis get hurt.”

I was tearing up again when they all came in for a group, no, a family hug. “You guys are the best family anyone could wish for.” When we pulled apart everyone went back to bed except Michael.

“Are you ever going to tell me what the nightmares are about?” he asked.

I sighed,” They’re about my past, and I know that raises more questions than it answers, but that’s all I feel comfortable saying for now.”

“I get it. I won’t push you right now, but one day I hope you’ll trust me enough to tell me about whatever’s got you so broken.”

I hope that too, I though as I fell back out of consciousness.