Forever and Ever // Lams

Hands

ALEXANDER'S POV

Thomas and I woke up, snuggled close together, our arms wrapped around each other. I knew we were only that way because in our dreams we had imagined each other as different people. As the people we really had wanted to be with...

Yet when our eyes met, some of last night's feelings wormed their way into our hearts.

"So..." I raised an eyebrow, meaning 'Do you regret it or is this a thing? At least for now.'

Somehow he was really able to get all of that from my eyebrow raise, a skill which I had thought only John possessed. "For now at least... God, the world really has turned upside down."

I smiled, not sure why I was happy. All of this was wrong. Wrong, wrong, wrong. The person I should be smiling at when I first wake up in the morning should be John Laurens. Not Thomas Jefferson. Yet here I am, somehow happy against all odds.

Peggy knocked on the door. "Are you two decent?" She called out.

I realized the answer was no, and we both hurriedly put on yesterday's clothes.

"We are now!" I called back, and she opened the door.

"We're going to see Herc and Laff now. Also, Alex do you have Tylenol? This is the worst hangover I've ever had."

I realized I was smiling again. What was wrong with me? I nodded cheerfully and went to the bathroom to grab some Tylenol and Thomas followed me.

He leaned in close to my ear. "Alex, I don't know if our feelings are real, or if they just exist because of the...circumstances, but... It would be nice to know if I can hold your hand and kiss you without having to ask first every time."

I turned to meet his gaze and my face was barely an inch from his. "Of course you don't have to ask." I whispered back, and our lips met.

Wrong. Wrong! This is all wrong, I should not be kissing this man, this is not the man I want to be with, to spend my life with. To adopt children and dogs and turtles with. This is just a rebound man. Somehow, that made me feel slightly better. A rebound, nothing more, but nothing less. Someone to... pass the time. I broke away from Jefferson and turned back to the medicine cabinet, grabbing a small bottle of Tylenol and bringing the whole thing to the kitchen.

I sat the bottle on the table, announcing, "I just assumed everyone would need some."

Everyone laughed, a tired, strained laugh, but at least it wasn't a completely forced one.

We decided Eliza should drive, she was the least hungover, and just generally the most responsible. We went out to the car and I sat next to Jefferson. I slid my hand into his and once again hated the feeling. This was not John's warm, soft hand, that always stiffened with excitement before relaxing when I grabbed it. It was Jefferson's cold, rough hand, that was too big for me to wrap mine around completely as I did with John's. I rolled my eyes and waited for a few minutes, before pretending a bump in the road made me drop Jefferson's hand. I didn't grab it again.

JOHN'S POV

I woke up early the next day and took one my family's many unused cars over to the hospital. I was praying that my friends wouldn't be there. Were they even still my friends? I guess I'd find out when school started again. My plan was to quickly check in on Herc and Laff, then leave.

I got to the hospital right as visiting hours began and ran inside. I asked the front desk where Herc and Laff's room was, and then found it as fast as I could.

If I hadn't known better, I would think Herc and Laff were just sleeping. Their beds were close together, I wondered why. Somehow, even though they were both unconscious, their hands had found each other. I smiled, imagining how Alex and I's hands always found each other as we slept, if we hadn't already fallen asleep holding hands.

I silently scolded myself. I needed to stop thinking about Alex. What we had was in the past, it seemed.

I realized I had probably been there for too long and, not wanting to run into Alex, I quickly left the room. I was about to round the corner of the hallway, but I heard Angelica's loud, throaty laugh and instantly froze in my tracks. I looked around wildly and saw a janitor's closet. I dove in, but left the door open a crack so I could see them. I missed them, especially Alex. No, I didn't miss him! I had just had a whole mental conversation with myself about forgetting about him, and I was already thinking about Alex again.

"No, you don't miss him, John." Said a tiny voice in the back of my head, "It's even more than that. You long for him, for his embrace, his lips on yours, his small hands grasping your larger ones at almost every second."

If I could glare at that stupid little voice to shut it up, I would.

But once I saw Alex, my heart froze and broke for the second time. I forgot about how much I missed the sweet little things about him and I was filled with sadness and rage and jealousy all at once. Tears instantly sprung into my eyes and slid down my face.

Alex was holding hands with Thomas Jefferson.

A/N: Sorry this chapter is a little shorter than usual, but I wanted to break it up from the next chapter. But no need to worry! The next chapter is already available no matter when you're reading this, because I published this story complete lol.

Since I never really talk to you guys, I'll let you hear a fun fact! This chapter was first named Heartbreak and Revenge Pt.3 and the last two chapters were parts one and two, but I realized I was going to have like 5 or 6 chapters all named "Heartbreak and Revenge Pt." so I changed this chapter's name to The World's Turned Upside Down, but finally I realized I had talked about hands a lot in this chapter, sparking the inspiration for my very creative chapter name, Hands. Anyways, sorry for rambling.

Thanks for reading, see you in the next chapter!