Blurred Sides (COMPLETE)

7.15.2

Ahsoka stood stone still, barely comprehending what she had just seen and heard. The reporter reappeared on the screen and started reminiscing about Padmé's announcement, but while the crowd around her started talking she grabbed her stuff and ducked quickly out of the market, hoping that no one saw her under the cowl. She went straight home, as fast as she could without hurting herself. She didn't let herself think about it until she had locked her door and was safe in the flat.

Anakin had covered for her. Ahsoka had no idea how (and she was pretty sure she didn't want to know how), but he had convinced not only the Council but the Senate and now all of Coruscant, that the Inquisitor was dead. More to it, he hadn't proven her identity.

How did he fake a DNA scan?!? Ahsoka wanted to pace but with her wound, she settled for sitting on the couch and resting her head in her hands. Her blood had soaked everything she had left down the street, it should have come up right away in the system! She barely managed to not leave a trail behind her to the house, and it was all over the street still unless someone had come by to clean it up.

How much did Padmé know? Had Anakin told her or had he kept it entirely to himself? Why had he hidden it?

To give me a chance, she realized. A chance to start over. One last shot at a normal life.

Ahsoka didn't even really know what normal was. All of her childhood, she had lived in the Temple, and for the past year, she had been held at Dromund Kaas. Could she do it? Could she really find a job somewhere, and settle into a rhythm under the surface, one without lessons and missions and battles? Could she maintain life on her own? She was almost eighteen, plenty of people lived on their own at eighteen.

I'm still a danger.

But she didn't have weapons. Tyrannus wasn't after her anymore, and Sideous was dead. If she didn't have a lightsaber, it would be a lot harder to hurt people, although she was plenty capable.

There's still the Darkness. It's not all gone.

I can fight it. I fought it at nights and I got rid of it, eventually. I can even sleep now, thanks to Anakin. I'll never use the Dark Side of the Force again.

And what about the Light?

Ahsoka wasn't a Jedi anymore, that much was clear. After everything she had done, she didn't deserve a shot at redeeming her name. Maybe a year ago, she could have, but it was far too late for that now. Someone like her couldn't live a life in the Temple. She had felt the Temple last night, and the feeling she got had been very clear: This is no longer your home.

Then I won't use either side of the Force, she decided. Maybe for small things, just in emergencies, but no more Sith Fire, no more Jedi Mind Tricks. No more Decay, no more healing. Telekinesis isn't on either Side if worst comes to worst. I won't be on either Side. I'll be in the middle of the balance. I won't be on either Side.

Ahsoka pondered the thought, the hope, that maybe she still had a chance. I can do this. I have a chance.

There was a lot she was going to have to do and it wasn't going to be easy, not by a long shot. She still had to keep her head low, too, and stay off the radar for a few weeks at least. Long enough to throw Tyrannus off her scent, but she could do it. It was possible.

She had a chance.

Ahsoka looked down at her bag of supplies. I don't have to leave, this time. I can stay.

Her gaze shifted from the bad to the window. The curtains were drawn but she knew, somewhere out there, Anakin was guarding her secret. She didn't know why, or what she had done to deserve his grace and mercy, but he was still looking out for her, even after all this time.