Juvenile Heart

Epilogue

Epilogue

One Year Later

          I laid on my cell bed, drawing all over the white paper.  It was a dragon and I was trying to make it as detailed as possible.  It's skin was black with a small Yin-Yang symbol on it's chest.  A puff of fire was coming out of it's mouth and I'd mixed the colored pencil granuales in to blend together nicely.  The last touch I added as I thought about everything in my life were the green eyes. 

          Asher had been on my mind too much lately and it was starting to annoy me.  I couldn't believe he would betray me after all those years of rebelling and crimes I did by his side.  He lied to me all that time – he said he loved me, but he didn't. 

          He made me trust him, but then he turned his back on me.  He made me believe that he was going to stick around and be there for me, but he wasn't.  In the end, it surprised me.  Everything he did had surprised me. 

          Even what Brock did surprised me.  I helped him and his family with so much and he went off and stabbed me in the back – well, the correct term would be shot me in the stomach, but that isn't my point. 

          I understood him when he said I had to pay – and yes, I should've died when he shot me.  I was sorry for what I did to Yvonne and him.  I was sorry Brecken had to pay for the things I did.  I was sorry for Kelsy and the people that I barely knew and killed in cold blood. 

          There wasn't a bone in my body that didn't regret what I did – and I wasn't one known for regret.  Even in Leah's letters, I told her that and she told me I must be sick.  She knows me fairly well and she knows it's truly a rare thing for me to feel that.

          I'd told her everything that happened.  I told her about robbing the bank and about all the people I killed.  I told her about the drugs I did and why I didn't leave juvie a year early.  I admitted to everything; I had no reason to lie about it. 

          At my trial, I admitted to that, too.  I told them everyone I killed and everyone I hurt and all the crimes I committed and all the families I tore apart.  I told them that God shouldn't even forgive me, and that I should burn in Hell. 

          The whole time during that interview, the cop just kept staring at me.  His eyes were filled with horror and wonder.  Horror at what I did and wonder at how I was even capable with doing the things I did and hurting the people I hurt. 

          Everyone seemed shocked at my words.  They read my confession out loud at the trail and I knew how I looked to the jury.  I looked like a cold blooded killer, and I was.  They called me a serial killer in the paper and they said I was a sociopath. 

          They were wrong, though.  I felt remorse and guilt over what I'd done.  I knew I deserved to rot in prison and that's just what I intended to do.  There was only so much pain one person could deliver in their lifetime before draining themselves almost completely. 

          And that's just what I'd done. 

          Not long after I confessed, I learned a few things out about what happened to the gang and the Howard family. 

          Max and Jay had skipped town, heading for Mexico.  Hector was found guilty in the murder of his father, but couldn't be connected to anything else.  He was sentenced to death.  Brock and Ashley were killed in a car accident and Asher was now doing time in a Florida penitentiary after murdering Kyle and Drake because of a fight at some bar they were at.  Marcus had committed suicide after Maria's overdose.