The Dark Knight Of The Soul

Chapter Fifteen

Harrison came home announcing he was going out again this evening and not to make him any food. I hadn't bothered to cook anyway so I wasn't in the slightest bit upset. He moaned about how it was difficult living with a depressant and he needed to get out and communicate with real people in the real world. I was about to question him when I stopped myself as I quickly realised something odd. He didn't ask about who was in the house? He has the app on his phone and that's how he watches my movements. What was most significant was, the fact that this was first time he's come home calm?

A thought popped into my head. He's doing this on purpose!

"I quite like it when you go out too? It's depressing having you around!"

I said as I walked past him to go into the lounge. His face was ashen with shock, "erm no. I'm not the one with mental issues here. You are!" He retorted.

I looked him in the eye, they were blazing with indignant fury.

"That's your opinion Harrison. Not mine!"

"Who the fuck do you think you are?" He snarled loudly.

"Your wife!" I said calmly.

Harrison's whole demeanor changed from raging like a bull to simmering on explosion. I felt my heart start to race as I noticed the change in Harrison, brought on a change for me. I was responding anxiously to his attitude, personality, mood temperament. Everything he did, I was anticipating his reaction and changing my emotions to accommodate him.

I was always on anxiety standby!

My phone pinged, and I went to see who was texting me. It was Ellie.

Hi jenny.

I just wanted to give you a call about the conversation we had earlier. Text me when it's convenient for you. Thanks Ellie.

I text back as Harrison slammed the door behind himself and thumped his way upstairs.

Hi Ellie.

Thank you so much for looking into this a bit deeper. I really appreciate it. Could you call me in about an hour? My husband is going out and I'd rather discuss it privately.

Regards

Jenny.

I quickly deleted her text and went to call my mother, I was hoping this would distract Harrison from the questions of who has contacted me by text.

"Hi mum, it's me Jenny."

I could tell from the way my mother slurred in her response that she was inebriated.

"Jen...jen...ny. Hello." She slurred, sleepily.

"How are you," I asked, but the answer was always the same.

"Oh, not good love...Not so good today.... My stomach... is playing up." She slurred.

I knew she meant her liver was giving her pain. "Have you had a glass of wine today?" I already knew the answer but asked it anyway.

"No...No wine..., it aggra...vates.. my stomach... Just vodka... When you coming over?" She winced, and I imagined she had felt some pain as she talked.

"Soon mum... Soon," I lied. I felt rotten as I hadn't seen her for almost a month. "Has Marge been visiting you," Marge was her sister, she called twice a week, once to collect her money from her benefits and a second time to make sure my mother had food and heating all week.

"No... Not seen Marge for... a while," she slurred slightly.

"Did she call on Monday with some money?" There was a pause as my mother tried to pay attention. "I can't remember?" She answered vaguely.