Big Girls Don't Cry

Chapter 6: Demi

"And done." Dame held up a small glob of pink bubble gum with pieces of curly hair sticking out of it. "That's the last of it." He threw it out his car window. I smiled sheepishly at him.

"Thank you."

"I know you didn't fall asleep with gum in your mouth. Who threw it? Joe?" Dame seem to only ever cared if Joe bullied me. I raised my eyebrow at him and crossed my arms.

"Your girlfriend actually." I said. He pursed his lips.

"And you saw her throw it?" I paused.

"Well..no, but who else would. And she is always chewing gum."

"Kylie's not like that, she wouldn't do that. And she's not my girlfriend." I didn't say anything, because people like him didn't understand. "Everyone isn't out to get you Nic, you need to relax sometimes." Suddenly, I remembered something Kylie said earlier.

"I overheard Kylie say you were trying to use me. What did she mean by that?" I watched his reaction. His face didn't give anything away, but I saw his hands tighten around the steering wheel. He smiled somberly.

"You really don't understand my feelings for you at all." He started the car, and began backing up. "I want to tell you something."

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"Just so we're clear, you guys are being safe right?"

"Mom!"

"What? A baby is the last thing neither of you need right now."

I didn't know how Dame telling me something and dinner with his mother connected, but here I was. Don't get me wrong I was happy to be here, but I could now see where Dame got his bluntness from. Since his mom was a doctor, she had no shame talking about sex and the human body. I spent most of my time at dinner either blushing or trying to keep my food down.

"Well mom, thanks for dinner, but we're heading upstairs now." Dame quickly grabbed my hand and dragged me upstairs. Before he closed the door I could hear her yell downstairs.

"Okay, you know where the condoms are!" Dame shook his head.

"I'm sorry about her." I chuckled.

"She loves you." I said with certainty. His expression turned serious and he walked towards the window in the back of his room. Since this was just a temporary house, he didn't have much furniture or decorations in his room. The window didn't even have curtains, so the moonlight was heavy in the space. His words came out quickly.

"I had a twin sister and her name was Demi. Where I come from bullying wasn't tolerated, and Demi was never bullied, but she still felt self conscious about the way she looked. She always was saying things like she was too ugly or too fat. To me, she was the most beautiful girl in the world, and I told her that everyday." Dame paused and ran his hand through his hair. I could barely make out his face in the reflection of the dark window. "After her second suicide attempt, my mother sent her away to a camp that her therapist recommend." Dame chuckled darkly. "She told us she hated it her first day there, but her therapist convinced my mom to give her some time to adjust. A month later she killed herself."

 I hadn't realised I had moved, but I was right next to Dame now. I put my hand on his shoulder softly. I still couldn't see his face, but I could tell he was crying. "In her death note she blamed one of the other campers for her decision to end her life. A lot of the other kids at the camp bullied her everyday she was there. There the reason she's dead." He turned to me then. The tears in his eyes didn't hide the anger within them. I had only ever seen him this mad after he fought Joe.

"When did she die?"

"July 12th."

"I'm sorry." My heart hurt for him. He put his hands on both sides of my head.

"I want revenge." He said, as he looked at me darkly.

"Harming them will only get you in trouble Dame."

"I'm not harming them; only the things they care about." I didn't know what to say after that, so I just hugged him. He hugged me back so tight I couldn't breathe.

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To help lightened the mood we decided to watch a movie. The long day was catching up to me, and I began to fall asleep in Dame's arms.

"I told you about my sister, because I need you to see that you can trust me Nic. You know I like you, and I know you like me too, but I don't deserve you. There's still too much hate in me to feel any love." What he said made sense, and as heartbreaking as it was, I knew that we probably weren't good for eachother. That didn't stop me from being hopeful though.

"You sure it has nothing to do with how I look?" I said quietly. He rolled his eyes.

"I don't know how many times i'm going to have to tell you, but you're beautiful. Literally. Everyone always asks me about you."

"In a good way?" I asked, unconvinced. Dame shook his head yes. I persisted. 

"What about in the future? Do you think we could be together?"

"If you still want me then, sure." We both smiled at each other with hope. Although, the moment was sweet in nature, I couldn't help but notice the warning in his words. I fell asleep in his arms, a place I never wanted to leave.

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I woke up and instantly noticed I was alone. The coldness from the bed consumed me. When I opened my eyes I saw Dame sitting at the edge of the bed. He was holding an old piece of paper in his hand. I couldn't make out the words on the paper, the only thing visible was a big purple star on the top right corner. I squinted to get a good look, but I could barely make out the shape before Dame got up and put the paper inside a drawer next to the bed.

"Good morning." I said. Dame looked up, startled to see me awake, before he smirked at me.

"Good morning, beautiful. I want to show you something." He reached back into the same drawer, and pulled out a fresher piece of paper. He handed me the paper and the words: Boys Basketball Manager Needed!, was spread across the top.

"What's this?"

"I know i'm going to college for football, but I thought it'd be fun to give basketball one last hurrah." He shrugged, but I could tell he was nervous. "I thought it'd be fun if you managed the team as well, so we could see each other more." I blushed at the fact that he wanted to be around me, but I couldn't do it. I was too scared. I thought of an excuse quickly.

"Do you really think you could handle being on the same team as Joe again? You guys are barely surviving the football season." Dame put his head down, and kept it down as he spoke.

"Is that all you're worried about? Is Joe?"

"No, but think about it. Me, you, and Joe all together in the same space, multiple times a week. Seems like a disaster to me." Dame looked irritated.

"Joe won't be a problem."

"I don't see how not."

"So youre saying no?" I shook my head yes, but he continued anyway. "What if this is my next part of the plan to get rid of Joe." His eyes dared me to protest. I really didn't want to be surrounded by Joe and his friends any longer than I had too. If I said no, then Dame would suspect that I didn't want Joe to leave me alone, and wasn't serious about the plan. If I said yes, then i'm just raising my chances of being harassed even more by him. There also was the fact that I didn't know anything about basketball. I turned to Dame to politely decline his terrible offer, but he looked at me with so much hope in his eyes, that I couldn't deny him. I guess I did want to spend more time with him, and I did want Joe gone.

"Fine. I'll do it." He smiled and hugged me.

"One more question. Will you wear my jersey tonight to the game?"