Sleeping With a Friend

Chapter Eight

Later that Friday, I had gotten an email from work saying they were sorry to hear that I was so ill and I was surprised to see a little “get well soon” attachment. Knowing my boss and coworkers as well as did, it was probably the mailroom.

Once Ashton had left, I was able to get a shower and wash away all of the embarrassment from last night. As if it wasn’t enough I had to go off of his word from what happened, I kept thinking about what would have happened if I would of woken up to him rather than just me on my bed. But then again, I wasn’t exactly revolting at the subject. There was this part inside of me that, every time I would have a moment to stop and think about something, that something was always Ashton and what it would be like to know him a different way than just friends. Even as I sat watching a movie, I couldn’t keep my attention to it. I felt like I needed to get him out of my head, yet I didn’t want to at the same time. It was starting to frustrate me, so I shut off the TV and sat in silence for a few minutes. But then, it was like I cued someone at the door and heard a knock. There was a light knock, much unlike the one I had heard yesterday. I hoped it wasn’t Ashton seeing as two nights in a row with the man and I would unraveling at his glance.

“Coming!” I yelled to the person, taking my good old time to get off the couch. I reached the door and opened it, the chain lock stopping it from going farther than a few inches. When looked past the chain I noticed Sophie, standing with her arms over her chest and a concerned look on her face. “What are you doing here?” I scolded.

“I want to talk. Can I come in?” Sophie suggested.

I shrugged, “Are you going to tell me all about what I didn’t do right in college? Because if you are, then don’t even bother.” I began shutting the door in her face, feeling the rage I had been keeping inside for a few days now finally reach the surface.

Her foot stopped the door, “Seriously,” She continued, placing both of her hands on the door. I sighed, rolling my eyes.

“Fine.” I spat and she moved her hands and foot away from the door so I could shut and unlock it. I opened the door wider with a stern look on my face. She gave me a flat smile and walked past me, her arms crossing back over her chest as if a form of defending herself. She trudged straight to the couch, sitting down on the far corner. I shut the door and took a deep breath, I was nervous to confront her because this wasn’t who I was. I wasn’t one of those people who had no problem spewing their feelings, I was always conflicted about them instead. Often times I found myself jealous of those who could.

I sat at the other end of the couch. With the television off, the only sound in the room was our breathing and the awkward shifts of movements that we both made. Minutes must have gone by before she finally spoke.

“Look, I know you’re pissed at what I said the other night, but I don’t get why?” She began, “I always say stuff like that to you and you never got mad before.” I shook my head and rolled my eyes. It seemed I had been doing too much of that lately, my eyes would roll in the back of my head and never come back.

“That’s just it.” I mumbled. “You always said those things and I never got mad. Well to tell you the truth, all those times you said it, it hurt a lot. But I never told you.”

“Why?” She interrupted, shifting on the couch to face me. “Why did you keep that from me? If I knew it hurt I wouldn’t have kept saying it.”

“You don’t get it do you?” I mirrored her actions, staring at her with a fierce gaze. “If I’m your best friend why would you even say it?”

Sophie shrugged, “I-I don’t know. I didn’t think about it, I just said it.”

“Sophie that’s your problem you don’t think before you say anything. You just blurt it out and you don’t care what kind of turmoil you put people in.” As harming as my words were, I was proud that they were finally getting off my chest. Lord knows how long I had thought about doing this so many times and now that I was, I felt so much better.

“Wow.” She scoffed, “I didn’t know you had that in you Y/N.” I knew she was offended, but I didn’t find one bit of me that cared.

“I think you should just go.” I told her, standing form the couch.

“Seriously? I can’t believe you right now.” She grumbled. “You don’t even sound like yourself.”

“Maybe I’m just sick of getting walked all over.” I opened the door again, “Now, I would like it if you left my apartment please.” She sucked her teeth and stood from the couch.

“Whatever.” She muttered walking past me as I held open the door. “Whenever you decide to take the stick out of your ass let me know.” I heard her say as she left me standing there alone. I watched her walk a bit down the hallway to make sure she wasn’t going to turn back around or want to continue bickering.

Maybe this marked the end of mine and Sophie’s friendship. We had always been different, but I never thought it would become a problem between us. I sat back on the couch and took a deep breath, I wanted to give myself a nice pat on the back for what had just happened. The best part was that it didn’t even bother me. I grabbed my phone and began texting Ashton, the only person that came to mind for the time being.

“So, I’m pretty sure I just ended a six year friendship. That’s awesome right?” I sent the text and sat in silence waiting.

“I’m guessing you talked to Sophie? And that it didn’t go good aha.” He replied, I shook my head like he could see it.

“I took your advice and told her how I felt and then I just kind of told her to leave. I didn’t want to deal with it or her anymore.”

“Well I hope you’re alright! I’m glad you finally told her the truth behind how you felt.” The conversation was quick and I stared at my phone, wondering what I should reply next. But Ashton did that for me, “If you’re feeling up to it, come over tonight. I know your probably sitting at home right now with the TV on some random channel. You know that I’m way more fun than that! Lol”

I smirked at the screen and began typing, “Actually the tv’s not even on!  But I would really like that. Text me your address.” I had one goal for tonight, prove to myself that I could be more than just that girl who does everything she says.