My Littlespace a book about me

Part 29- Signs To Not Ignore From Your Little

First, let me get one idea out of the way before someone gets angry: I'm not saying that ignoring your little in general is ok. I'm saying that sometimes, when your little is being bratty or fussy, they genuinely aren't expecting you to focus on them, because they are just trying to have fun. Or sometimes you're in a position where you genuinely are so pressed for energy, time, attention, etc. that you struggle to focus hard. But here are some signs in your little that are possibly indicative of bigger things, and should be immediantly adressed, understood, approached, or talked about. At the very least, they mean you need to keep a closer eye on your little in case they're in a position where they're struggling with something pretty serious!

1.) They can't enjoy anything

I'm not talking about feeling fussy for a day or even a week. I'm not talking about them having something go wrong in their life and it is upsetting them. I'm talking about persistent adhedonia, or a lack of satisfaction, interest, or energy that takes away the joy they feel in the activites they usually enjoy or care about. Often highly indicative something major is going on mentally.

2.) Sudden disinterest in food 

Again, you almost certainly aren't a mental health professional. So don't think you are. If you can't handle this situation, reach out for help,resources online,etc...but never for a second think you can simply fix it with words or pushing, because it often goes a lot deeper than you realize. But the trick here is to set up a healthy environment. Have foods around that are less likely to cause guilt. Give smaller portions, because it's better to someone  eat 12- 1500 calories and be mentally ok then to push 2400 on them and see them sick it back up. And reach out to professionals if you need to, because it's ok to not know what to do, even as a mommy/daddy/caregiver.

3.)Their anxiety is going up and getting in the way of life

This one is fixed with patience, time, and communication, pure and simple. Though 'fixed' is a bad word, since the proper words might just be 'you help them find coping mechanisms and find their triggers in order to better cope and understand their anxiety and its effects.' But that's a mouthful. So try to do what you can to help them cope, be their support, and know what does or does not overwhelm them. And don't be that jerk who ignores their anxiety and just forces them to do things because you think "if you see how it isn't so bad,you'll get over it"...because even if that is something a therapist might suggest over time, there's a difference between 'i am a professional who understands when that is appropriate' and 'i am a jerk who thinks i can force them into panic attacks to make them feel better,. Keep that in mind.

So that's a pretty heavy post...but one i figured would be worth writing. I see many littles online who struggle with anxiety, anger, gender identity, and while i can't tell you what to do with all of that, i can give my best advice and tell you what ive seen work CAN work in some situations. I can also tell you that every therapist i've known, seen, met, or read about kind of wants to say the same thing.

"You are their partner not their therapist. If you try to be both, you will potentially cause greater harm. I know it's hard to believe, but trust me. Be supportive, but know when it's ok to step in and when it's time for a professional to help". 

I agree so good luck, i hope  you don't need this advice...if you do, i wish you and your significant other the best fortune can give you.