November 12, 2018
O is for Older
I have a confession to make. I am older than you. I don't know if that would make any difference. It's not like you know me. It's not like you would know me.
Remember a few letters ago where I told you Mom does not approve of you? That's the reason for it. We (Mom and I) have long realized that I would need someone more mature aka someone older (and yes I know age is not an accurate determiner of maturity, but it's one way to assess it), and yet here I am feeling something for you.
It's so frustrating because I keep on saying that I want someone older, someone more mature and yet here I am, I keep on having crushes on guys younger than me. Quite honestly, until now I have my moments where I wonder if I have a crush on you. As what I've told you four letters ago, that's how I introduced you as to my mom, but until now I'm not sure if that's true. I mean, sure, I act like it, but there's something that stops me from completely believing the huge possibility that I do have an infatuation with you. Is it the age?
Do you find it weird that someone older has a crush on you? (I mean if ever it's true) Is it creepy?
I'm sorry. Trust me, I tried to stop countless times already. And as you can tell, those weren't so successful.
Honestly, sometimes I find it embarrassing. You have so much to experience still, so much to learn, so much to see. And really I shouldn't be talking about this anymore like we are a possibility. Do I even hope to be with you? God, I have so many questions for myself too.
Enjoy life. Though I don't think I need to tell you that. You seem to be doing a great job just by yourself.
Live young, wild, and free,
Just Anon
