"Hey Dan, do you want to-"
I dropped my blade on the floor at the sound of Phil's voice as he was entered my bedroom.
He stopped at the sound of metal crashing onto the floor, and found his way to my bathroom as I quickly rolled up my sleeve.
He saw the blade, and his eyes moved towards my arm, then to me.
"Oh Dan... what have you done?" He spoke sadly. He wasn't angry. He was just... dissapointed.
I'd dissapointed him. It made me feel sick.
"It's a couple!" I said quickly, plastering a smile onto my face despite my arm beginning to sting. "It's fine, really."
"Dan, any at all aren't fine. It's fueling an addiction."
He stepped towards me and I flinched back. His hand reached out for my arm, and I hesitated.
"Please Dan, just let me see. I won't be mad."
My eyes welled up with tears as hundreds of familiar scenes flooded back to me, blinking them away as Phil carefully pulled my sleeve up my arm.
There were only a few, and they looked like scratches compared to what I'd done last week.
But still Phil had tears in his eyes as he scanned my bleeding skin.
"You need to stop this, Dan. I'm here now."
"I'd held back for so long. I painted on my arm to stop the urges." I paused, "Now I remember how good it is."
"Dan. Do you want to die?" His voice wobbled on the last word.
"No." I shook my head decisively. "Not with you here."
"Then stop. Please. Every time you cut you'll become more and more addicted, and you'll be back to where you started. But worse. It'll be harder to fight off.
And then one day, you'll cut too deep, and I won't be able to save you.
Do you want that?"
"No..." I answered him quietly.
"Then please..." He brought me towards him into a hug, pecking my nose with his lips "...Don't do this anymore."
"I'm sorry." My head leant into his neck, enjoying his embrace.
"It's okay. Let's get some food."
"I'm not hungry."
"Dan. I know you haven't been eating whilst I was gone. You probably don't realise how thin you've gotten again."
His words shocked me, but I managed to choke out, "I'm scared to eat..."
"It's just a relapse. You can get through it. I'm not letting you starve yourself again." He stepped away, and smiled at me gently with an outstretched arm. "Let's share a bowl of salad, okay? "
"We'll do it together."
YOU ARE READING
Wordless Conversations // Phan (sequel to Bring Me Home)
FanfictionDan's better now. He's been clean for over a year. He takes his medication and his relationship with Phil is going strong. But then one day something happens. A terrible accident. Dan visits everyday, but with Phil in a coma, can Dan keep himself to...
