The Switch / Shourtney

Chapter Twenty: Night out

March 27th – April 9th 2018

My feelings were way harder to ignore recently, almost too much to be casual or subtle. After Courtney's confession to me a couple weeks ago about Wahlid, I felt different. I felt so incredibly close to her and it made me even more confused. I wanted to be there for my friend. She obviously was going through something. And at the same time, I wanted to confess to her how I felt. But really all I could do was cheer her up in the only way I knew how, acting like a complete idiot and giving into her jokes.

We were all hanging around in the office. I was throwing plastic forks up at the ceiling trying to get them to stick while Courtney chattered at me in the background.

"Hey, we should all go out for drinks before you and Damien leave for Japan next week." Keith suggested.

"Oh I like this idea," agreed Olivia, "Sort of like a going away party."

"Uh, you guys do know that I'm only going for 10 days, right?"

"We know." Courtney smirked, "We can't celebrate your departure?"

I held my middle finger up at her making her laugh out loud.

"But seriously, I like this idea, we need a squad night out." Keith said, "This is happening."

"And I'll actually be able to drink." Noah added with a grin. He had turned 21 last month. Sometimes it was hard for me to remember how much younger than me he was.

"Ok fine, we'll go, I'll tell Dames"

"Yes!" Courtney cheered.

Which is how the squad, Damien, Boze, and I ended up at Oasis a week and a half later, the night before I was leaving for Tokyo. The seven of us grabbed a table and ordered drinks. Damien got a water and I ordered a beer. I didn't want to drink too much since I still had packing to do when I got back to my apartment.

"You're such a party pooper." Courtney teased as she and Boze threw back a shot each. "This is your going away party and you're not gonna try to get at least a tiny bit trashed?"

I grinned, "I'll leave that to you guys. I've got a flight in the morning."

Courtney rolled her eyes at me good naturedly and downed a second shot, making a face at the taste of it.

"Let's dance!"

She grabbed Boze's hand and my arm and pulled us onto the small dance floor in the middle of the tables. A Chainsmokers song was playing and she immediately started to jump around like a crazy person. I looked over at Boze and she nodded back at me grinning, we started dancing like idiots too.

I loved seeing Courtney like this, so free, not caring what anyone thought of her. Just being herself. This was my favorite version of Courtney. After a couple songs, and my horrible dancing, I left to go get some water and ended up getting caught up in a conversation with Noah and Damien.

"I can't believe we're going tomorrow man." Damien exclaimed. "It's absolutely crazy."

"Me neither," I replied. "Feels unreal."

We talked about the coming week for a bit, filling Noah in on our plans until I noticed Courtney out of the corner of my eye. She wasn't on the dance floor with Boze, Olivia, and Keith. Courtney was sitting at the table alone, and her face didn't look so care free anymore. I excused myself from Damien and Noah and I went to sit down next to her.

"Tired of dancing?"

She looked up at me, "Nah, just tired in general."

Her voice had the same quality to it that it had when she showed up at my apartment that night. Defeated.

"Want to talk about it?" I asked, and it was like I gave her permission to open the flood gates.

"I just don't understand Wahlid. One day he'll be so perfect, and then the next it's like I'm not even there. We'll make plans and he'll cancel when something important comes up. And I get it that work takes up your time, I mean just look at our work week, but I just feel like I'm constantly playing second fiddle to whatever else he has going on."

I nodded, letting her continue her rant.

"I feel like he doesn't want me anymore, doesn't need me or love me anymore. I feel like I'm trying to hold on to this memory of us being so good together and he's just over it."

Her words were slightly rushed and her face was flushed as she spoke. Her honesty was definitely due to how much she had been drinking.

"I don't know what to do. I don't want to lose him, or I guess I don't want to lose what we used to have. Recently I feel like I've already lost part of him, you know?"

I nodded again, and waited a moment before saying, "You really need to talk to him about this Court."

"But, I don't want to make things any worse, I just want things to be ok."

I shook my head, "You speaking up about your feelings is not going to ruin things. You deserve the best and you need to be an adult and clear things up with Wahlid."

She opened her mouth to speak but I continued. "Court, you need to tell him that if he wants to be with you, he needs to step up, and make you a priority, because that's the only way your relationship is going to work. Ok?"

She nodded, and I felt a physical pain in my chest. I needed to help my friend. This is what I had to say, to do. But it was so incredibly hard for me to try to help her fix her relationship when all I really wanted was for it to fall apart. I would not let myself be that douche bag though who only takes care of his best interests. As much as it hurt me, I needed to put Courtney and her feelings first.

Around an hour later we wrapped up the evening. It was 12:00 and Damien and I really wanted to get some sleep before out flight tomorrow, and I still had packing to do. We said goodbye to everyone and they wished us safe travels.

From the bar, I drove to the drug store near my apartment to buy the last-minute things I needed for my trip. I walked through the fluorescently lit rows of products mindlessly throwing items into my basket. It was hard to concentrate on anything besides for the conversation I had with Courtney at the bar. As much as I wanted to be with Courtney, I also wanted her to be happy and if that was with Wahlid, I wanted them to work it out. But that didn't mean that I wasn't internally kicking myself for helping the other guy.

I paid for my stuff at the register and drove back to my apartment to finish packing. I had just closed my suit case and pulled out my Pajama pants for the night when I got a text from Courtney.

"Can you come over?"

A/N: Get ready guys. This next one is going to be big.