Not Everything Goes According to Plan (Brallon/Ryden)

Chapter 11: Remember Me

{Brendon's POV (Mixing it up bitches) flashback to that morning}

Dallon's so soft I can just cuddle with him forever. I love him,! I love that he's mine. I make my way closer to him under the blankets and wrap my arm around his torso.

He's so beautiful when he sleeps.

Dallon, do me a favor a stay like this forever.

I don't want us to change, we need to stay like this.

My thoughts are interrupted by my phone buzzing next to me.

"Damnit Spencer, why do you have to interrupt everything." I whisper trying not to wake Dallon.

I turn to get my phone and see there's a message. I rub my eyes and get all the groggy out of my face.

My stomach sinks.

Ryan Ross: Brendon, I know it's been a while but, I'm sorry. I miss you.

-Rryo

I don't know whether to be pissed or grateful. All the memories flood back of that one day, that horrible event. He just left me there. So confused and without sign or warning. Did our relationship mean nothing? Was I only a fuck buddy to him?

No reason, just an 'I have to go'. No sorry. No sign of sympathy.

As my thoughts build up, my heart begins to speed and my hands tremble.

I can't go through the pain again. I-I just can't.

I quickly scramble through my belongings on the living room table. I pull out a cigarette and light it.

I need to relax.

I need to calm myself.

I need to let go of the past.

As I blow out smoke and the bitter smell of nicotine fills the air, I cough. I watch the summer breeze intertwine with the soft gray fumes as it sails past me and out the window. The smoke moves on, it continues without looking back.

Why now? I question myself as I wheeze out another short cough to try and not wake Dallon.

I am unsuccessful as I hear him mutter something scrambling through the sheets. It's probably some shit about how I shouldn't smoke.

We continue back and fourth about 'how he cares about my health' but I just ignore his suggestions. He doesn't understand what I'm going through. He doesn't understand what pain I'm in. I begin to tear up wondering if I'll ever be able to share this side of me with him.

"Brendon! What is wrong with you? Last night was one of the best nights of my goddamn life, and now you're acting like a fucking child. What-is-wrong?" He spits out at me.

Dallon you don't get it.

I can't deal with him right now. I need some air.

I apologize and slowly get out from under the covers clenching my phone, and walk towards the kitchen. I accidentally click my home button and the phone screen lights up. There it is again. That fucking message.

I lean my head against the hallway frame and lose it.

Ryan I miss you too. I never wanted to be apart, I wanted to stay together forever. But you left-you fucking son of a bitch-you left me lost and confused. No explaination, no apology, just a goodbye.

Tears roll down my face as I uncover the forgotten feelings. I was so hurt. I

am so hurt. I fall to the floor and try to hide my pain and sobs but it's no use.

Dallon runs up to me and wraps his masculine arms around my waist.

"Shhh...shhhh... it's okay Bren."

He whispers.

I slowly cuddle up into his neck and feel safer. I can't stop this crying. My eyes just keep filling up with tears as my heart keeps breaking.

Why now Ryan!? It's been two years! You never reached out to me!!! You left me for dead, I told you I loved you and you threw our friend ship away. And now what?! You expect me to call you? To tell you I miss you? Too late now, I love Dallon.

But problem is, I miss you too.

As the sobs and breaths get bigger, I clench on the Dallons shirt as he lays his head on mine and moves his fingers through my hair. I drop my phone and he shifts his head.

The screen is still on. He can see my pain.