John,
There's only a shadow of me, in a manner of speaking I'm dead.
And now I have to be.
There are several ways tomorrow could turn out, several ways Moriarty could get the best of me. This by far is my least favorite. This one involves me dying, never seeing you again.
I hope you never have to read this, I hope that I can come home with you tomorrow night, take you in my arms and reassure you that it's going to be okay. I hope that I can come home and burn this blasted letter, so that you never, ever, have to read it.
But, if that doesn't happen, there's something that I need to get off my chest: I'm a fake, John. Everything I ever did was fake, it's all a cheap parlor trick. I googled you when I first met you, I wanted to impress you. John, there is no great detective Sherlock Holmes, who can know everything about a person just by looking at them. There is only me: William Sherlock Scott Holmes, a liar and a fake.
John, if something happens tomorrow, if I die, know that it was all a lie, I lied about everything. Everything except the way I feel about you.
I love you, I love you so so so much. Even if after everything I put you through you can't love me back, I still love you.
I'll be thinking of you, in the afterlife, heaven, whatever is out there.
It's always you,
Sherlock Holmes.
Dated: January 14, 2012
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Beloved My John - Johnlock
FanfictionJohn, You asked me once why I loved you. You asked me why someone as extraordinary as me could love someone as ordinary as you. To me John, you are extraordinary. I have never been good at expressing the way I feel about you in words. So instead...
