all the world's a stage // prinxiety ✔

♡ 31 - snap ♡

"No problem, Virgil. Hope you're feeling better."

"Thank you." And he waved lazily, and then used his hoodie paws to wipe away hot tears from his eyes. His eyelids became heavy and soon he passed out on Patton's couch.

♡

Virgil: hey

Roman: You texting me first? Damn

Virgil: can you come over later? at like 3 or something?

Virgil: if you can you don't have to

Roman: Absolutely

♡

Patton didn't get it, but in a way, he did.

Virgil had a full on panic attack in the car when Patton was driving him home, causing him to have to pull over to comfort him.

The next morning at breakfast, Virgil looked better and was texting Roman asking to meet up with him later.

"How are you, bud?" Patton asked. He set down a plate of blueberry waffles in front of the teenager.

Virgil shrugged. "It's still... weird."

"It's not weird," the older one reassured him.

"It's not weird for me to like Roman right after Declan just...?"

Patton suddenly gripped the edge of the table tightly and his head jerked to the left. He put a hand up to his temple to stop it, but it didn't work.

"Patton?"

The older one looked like he was about to snap, his face burning with rage and sorrow, but when he opened his mouth, it was only sorrow. He slumped.

"Stop talking about Declan, Virgil." His head jerked again and he cringed. "Or not like that! He's- He's not- dead!"

The whole moment was out of character for Patton and Virgil was taken aback. He couldn't form sentences.

"Declan was my best friend in the whole world for years aside from Logan, you know," Patton went on. "You don't just get to be friends with him for a couple weeks, date him for a couple months, and pretend to know this pain like I do! Just- Just stop!" His head jerked so violently, you could hear a faint pop. "Stop talking!"

Tears streamed down his face and though he was taller than Virgil, he seemed to shrink.

Virgil stood up shakily. "Look, I-I'm sorry?"

"You know when you try to keep someone you love alive for years? You stay up late every night and give everything to someone because they made it clear they depend on you? Every single move you make could lead to disaster and you want everything for someone else out of love, and you don't even notice the bags under your eyes and how you get angry for no reason and cry for no reason, until it's too late and you've distanced yourself from everyone, you have depression now, and you want to give up but you can't because they need you?"

He raised his voice and tried to bite back more tears, but failed. He wasn't finished talking. "A-And all of that goes to waste because your best friend just fucking dies? You don't know what it's like!

"I'm not saying you haven't suffered these past months. But all I'm saying is that I'm not the right person to go to for Declan problems when I have Declan problems of my own and I can't keep everything together all the time! You might think I can do this, but I can't solve anything really. I couldn't save my best friend and I surely can't help you. Haven't you realized I'm not happy either? Ever?"

Then, his voice faltered and it was barely over a whisper.

"I don't want to feel bad for myself. I just want this to be over, Virgil... I wanna forget. Tell me this is all a nightmare."

Patton finally slumped down onto a chair and stared blankly at the spot where Declan would have sat.