all the world's a stage // prinxiety ✔

♡ 46 - walk ♡

Deciding to take a walk to ease his mind, Virgil breathed in the New York air, which was both wonderful and disgusting. He realized that description applied to a lot of things about New York.

He found a bench by a graffitied brick wall and sat there cross legged, silently. He plugged his ear buds into his phone and began to play Sing to Me Instead by Ben Platt which is an album you should listen to if you haven't already because it's fucking beautiful.

When he felt a light tap on his shoulder a few minutes later, he jolted and saw Patton grinning at him. He paused his music and waved. Patton sat down next to him.

"Shouldn't you be in your dressing room by now?" Patton asked.

"Taking the day off," Virgil replied, "for mindfulness and shit."

"Well, what's up?"

"I went on a date with Roman. And I kissed him."

Patton's jaw dropped. "You kissed him?"

Virgil nodded slowly. He was waiting for Patton to scold him for doing it so early, but he didn't.

Patton hugged his best friend tightly and kissed his forehead. "I'm so proud of you... But take care of yourself, okay? If anything... happens, you tell me."

"Yeah, I will."

"You sure?"

"Yeah, I'm sure."

Patton sighed. "So, what do you wanna do?"

Virgil shrugged. "Just walk around?"

"Sure!" Patton stood up and held his hand out, and Virgil slipped his own hand in and walked next to Patton.

They walked in silence, Virgil stopping to take pictures in front of the coolest graffiti he could find.

"Why're you out here?" Virgil asked.

"I was trying to feel a little better, I guess."

Virgil looked up at his taller friend. "What do you mean?"

"I'm really," Patton breathed out, "worried about Logan. He was ignoring me for a little while and when he called, he sounded messed up."

"Messed up?"

"He was, like, crying." Patton shook his head and laughed sadly. "I dunno, I've only seen him cry once and that was years ago for something really intense. I bet he didn't even cry as a baby." He tried to make a joke, but it fell flat.

The actor didn't want to ask what the intense thing was, so he kept walking, trying to imagine what Logan Taylor crying would be like. He couldn't form the picture and he nodded at Patton. "If he's ignoring you, I can contact him if you want me to."

Patton fidgeted with his hands and said through clenched teeth, "Shit. I dunno, Virge. If you can, then yeah. I guess."

"Something else is bothering you."

"Well, there's usually more than one thing bothering me."

"Wanna, uh, talk? About it?"

The barista shoved his hands into his pockets to avoid fidgeting any longer. There was a slight strain in his voice. "No."

Virgil chewed his lip. "Are you lying?"

"Yeah! I am!" Patton's entire body deflated as he let all his emotions seep out. "I'm worried about Logan, I'm worried about whether I have enough money to survive, I'm worried I'll never get a book published, and I'm worried about-" He stopped.

"What?"

"...You."

The younger put his hand out to touch Patton's shoulder, and Patton had no response to it.

"You haven't even lived here for a full year yet, a-and all you've been surrounded by is negativity and you already go through a lot of stuff and I'm trying to keep everything in because you're young and I want you to be happy!" He sounded absolutely helpless. "And now you're in another relationship and I don't want you to trust Roman so fast! Look, you two are great together and I'm sure Roman treats you right, but if you aren't careful, it'll be the same thing over again and I don't want you to get hurt."

"But..." Virgil couldn't think of a reply.

"You're smarter than people give you credit for, but I was in a relationship like the one you had with Declan when I was younger. I told you about it when we first met at my apartment. I don't want you having to go through that twice."

"What about you? Patt, you need to pay attention to yourself more! You're a great friend. And I love you. And I'm sure you'll finish that book."

Patton looked away anxiously, nails digging into his palms. "Well, thanks. And about the book, I have nothing."

"What do you mean?"

"I've had an idea for forever, but the only thing I have written for it is a song lyric that kinda matches the story."

Virgil found a different bench next to a tree and they sat together. "Which lyric?"

Patton opened his mouth to speak, but he stopped himself. He pulled out the notebook Logan gave him and handed it over. It was completely empty except for one sentence on the first line—the lyric.

I can't afford to love someone who isn't dying by mistake.