High School Blues

Chapter 3

I stood there absolutely speechless.

I didn’t even know how to begin to explain myself, I couldn’t even try to because I was not even sure of my explanation.

He gave me one last look and then walked out of the room, slamming the door behind him.

For some reason I didn’t run after him but instead fell onto the bed, I was physically and emotionally drained and my headache from the alcohol was taking over my body. I felt so utterly weak and helpless and I felt like I couldn’t do anything but fall asleep.

The next morning I woke up and I was in my own bed, in my own house with Hayley, Anna and Tamara on the floor. I was so relieved that someone had driven me home last night and gotten me far away from that blonde haired guy and that party.

As I got up I almost immediately fell back onto my bed again, I felt horrible. My hangover was really starting to kick in and the memories from last night started to flood through my brain like a tsunami wave.

Oh no, Luke. I had completely forgotten about last night. I didn’t even explain myself, I let him just walk out! I ran to the phone and dialled his number, but there was no answer. Damn you caller ID. I knew I had to get to him before things got too ugly and I couldn’t just leave it until Monday to explain what had happened. I was seriously in the wrong and I needed to make things right.

I automatically knew where he would be and quickly got changed and ran down to the bus stop.

I was waiting for nearly an hour on the beach before I saw three guys emerge from the water. Luke, Dan and my brother. Oh god, my brother was here! How was I supposed to make things right with Luke with my brother standing there, I couldn’t explain myself without completely spiling everything that had happened last night.

I can’t even begin to imagine how my brother would react if he found out.

“Hey Jose what are you doing here?” Dan called as the boys grew closer.

“Um I need to speak to Luke, is that alright with you guys?”

“Yeah sure I’ve gotta be home soon anyway, see you Josie!” Dan said as he walked towards his car.

“Jacob, is it okay if I talk to Luke by myself?” I asked nervously, knowing that he would be difficult.

“Sure Josie if it’s important I won’t get in the way.” Jacob replied. Wow my brother was actually not being a complete dickhead. He could obviously sense there was something wrong with Luke and I guess because they’re friends he wants me to make it right.

And soon enough it was just us two standing in the middle of a completely deserted beach.

“Luke” I began, but I was so nervous that I couldn’t even remember what I was going to say. I didn’t even have an explanation. Should I just begin to apologise? Or try and make up and excuse so I don’t seem like such a pathetic low-life.

“Well Josie, are you going to explain yourself or just stand there like an idiot” He said coldly.

I took a deep breath and gathered my thoughts.

“Okay, I guess I’ll just start from the beginning. After what happened at the beach, I was really into you and I mean like really, and I honestly thought you were to. But then the next day at lunch people started to tell me what you were really like, a player. You play with girls and toy around with them, you treat them like they are just a piece in your game. How many girlfriends have you had? Yeah that’s what I thought.

Anyway so I was talking to Hayley and she told me that I needed to get revenge, on behalf of all of the girls whose hearts have been broken by you, and because I was so furious with you because I thought you were different I agreed to it. So I started flirting with a few guys at the party and things just kind of got too far. Well way too far actually. And I really didn’t mean for any of it to happen. I was so confused and it was all happening so fast.”

I took let out a huge breath that I had been keeping in while I was talking and looked back up at Luke to see his reaction. I knew it wasn’t a full explanation or apology for ‘cheating’ on him but I guess it was better than nothing. Luckily it looked like he had calmed down a little bit, but I saw that his eyes were filled with sadness and disappointment.

“Really Josie? You’re one of those girls, like Hayley and them? I basically admitted we were a ‘thing’ to everyone and then you go and practically have sex with some random guy and then claim it’s my fault because I’m a player.

God Josie you really don’t get it, I really thought you were different, Jacob told me all about how you were not like the girls I normally date and I believed him because you seemed so different that day at the beach. You were the first girl I connected with and it felt like we really had something.But I guess he was wrong because you’re exactly like them.

I completely opened up to you and told you things that I have never even told anyone that day on the beach and you act like that’s nothing? Was it all a part of your plan, to make me fall hard for you and then humiliate me like that by hooking up with some random guy? Wow Josie I hope you’re happy, if humiliating me is what you wanted then there you go, mission accomplished”

My heart sunk. I felt like my whole body had just completely stopped functioning. I couldn’t believe what Luke had just told me. Everything was changed. I was the bad guy and he was the good one. I was playing him just like he had played all of the other girls.

Had he deserved it? I don’t know and I really shouldn’t have been getting revenge on behalf of all the other girls he had messed with. That wasn’t my business. I guess that was the whole reason Hayley had wanted me to do this to him, to get revenge.

He grabbed his surfboard and started walking back to his car not looking back at me once. I fell onto the sand and started to cry, I felt like complete shit. I had just lost the only thing that truly made me feel happy.

Why did I always fuck things up?