The Photographer [Taejin]

21 다시 함께 (together, again)

Kim Seokjin was snuggling on his going to be the bed for some months, his clothes already on his wardrobe.

His long legs were hanging out from the bed. Fingers tapping and his brain running fast with many thoughts.

'What was he trying to see before?' He asked himself, feeling himself blush. He still had flashes of the supposedly called V body etched on his mind.

Seokjin was a professional. He never really felt attracted to anyone, not to other supermodels nor his companions nor friends.

Some said it was the forgotten trauma from back then, but Kim Seokjin thinks otherwise.

Kim Seokjin was just in love with the concept of love.

Except that his idea of love was different from other people's conceptions.

He thought that most people's idea of love was hypocritical.

That people had the idea of love idolized, the beauty of butterflies flying like crazy on their stomachs, the sweaty palms while you wait for him/her to appear, the feeling of wanting to touch these bodies with their aching fingertips, the breathtaking feeling of getting lost in all their valleys and curves.

But, once said idolized loves run out and disappear, once the problems start to afloat and the fights become more common, once bodies age and sickness approach, said love seems to disappear.

Most people were not made to endure the hardships of falling and remain in love.

Just a minimal part on this earth population endured said turbulent yet beautiful growth process of loving.

As for Jin?

Kim Seokjin thinks that love is everlasting.

What is love if not acceptance of the other, no matter what that is?

Even if it hurts sometimes, even if bodies age and personalities change, love is an ever-changing form of growth. What he really didn't respect was abuse and disrespect, as a victim of abuse himself.

He still didn't find that somebody to fall in love with. That person whom he wants to love unconditionally, as some would say, to death takes them apart.

He is still waiting for those feelings of emotional instability caused by falling in love. The bouncing between exhilaration, euphoria, increased energy, sleeplessness, loss of appetite, trembling, a racing heart and accelerated breathing, as well as anxiety, panic, and feelings of despair.

He was ignorant with said feelings, as he never has fallen in love.

Yet, he learnt to love himself unconditionally instead of someone else.

So why is he feeling like a fly caught in a spider's web since the first meeting with that americano boy?

Was it his straightforwardness? Was it his eyes, so piercing and unforgivable? Was it his way of talking to Jin as if he was not a worldwide famous model?