Draco Malfoy, Broken

Chapter 45 - Control

Chapter 45 - Control

Published: 3/31/19

Updated: 4/15/19 for grammar/spelling issues

***TRIGGER WARNING - Offensive and sexual assault terminology, despondent thoughts and explicit content.***

Blaise hadn't bothered to wait up for Draco this time. He snuggled with Theo in his bed, who was shaking despite his reserve.

"I'm sorry I scared you," Blaise whispered, into Theo's ear as his head rested under his chin.

"Please don't go... I need you," Theo whimpered. "I can't hold it in without you here."

"I'm not going anywhere," Blaise promised. He felt terrible for scaring him so badly.

"Are you really going to wait over eight months for Neville?" Theo said, softly.

"I don't really have a choice. If we get caught, he wouldn't be able to keep his job. You should have seen my mom's expression when I said he was a professor. It looks... improper. The Board of Governors wouldn't let him teach if there were rumors of him... being with a student. I can't let him risk that."

"I'm sorry," Theo whispered.

"It'll be alright. I haven't had much self-control in the past... this should be a test."

"Abstinence. Might be rough, Blaise," Theo smirked.

"Yeah... I know. I'll have some vicarious entertainment watching those two idiots court each other."

Theo laughed quietly, but said, "Draco was so... normal today."

"I saw. It was nice... but fragile. He's still afraid," Blaise said, concerned. "We have to be careful."

"Yeah. He really was happy though. You think they're doing anything?"

"Kissing and groping. I can't image Dray moving up to bigger things. Potter knows to be careful with him."

"Did you tell him?" Theo asked, surprised.

"No, he can read Draco easy enough."

Theo nodded and shivered, and they lapsed into silence for a long time. "Blaise...."

Blaise's eyes were already heavy when he asked, the long, restless night before was dragging him under. "Yeah," he yawned.

"Your mom?"

"Yeah?"

Theo just looked at him. He didn't know how to ask the questions he wanted to ask.

"She told me about all the shit she had to deal with growing up. Her mother murdered... being abused and... worse. She explained why she was the way she was. She had reasons. I don't know what to say... I just finally understood her. It calmed me down."

"So, you're not afraid of her anymore?"

"I wasn't afraid of her," he insisted.

Theo lifted his head up to stare at him with a raised eyebrow.

Blaise just nodded. "I saw what she could do. I had no idea if I really mattered to her enough. She taught me how to curse and hex, how to manipulate spells. She knows so much... it did frighten me a bit. Her abilities did scare me... and we never really talked about anything. I was always alone, self-sufficient," Blaise said, few tears coming out.

"I saw... when I was there. You tightened up whenever she was in the room, especially when she looked at me."

"I've seen enough bodies. I didn't like how she was looking at you."