Coldmess

It's past 11pm in my world

{Asher's Pov}

"Yes sir, I'll be collecting all the projects after the vacation" I said to our biology teacher as I and Ivara stood in the biology lab.

"Okay and make sure to be strict Mr. Cromwell" He says giving me a gentle smile as he leaves me and Ivara to study in the lab, entrusting us with the keys to lock up while we leave.

"I can't believe the finals are not even a month away." Ivara said. We were last among the people in school, waiting until the school closed later to leave and planning to study a little before we bid the school goodbye for Christmas.

"Last night Cason kissed me" I blurted out.

"Cason what?" I heard three voices asking in shock. I turned around to see Faith and Doris who dropped there bags and quickly gathered around me. God why do these guys always tower over me. Cause you're small my brain chidded, like I didn't know.

"He kissed me..." I repeated gulping the knot forming in my throat.

"So he loves you?" Ivara asked curiously.

"No...he said he liked Josephine as he kissed me..." I said looking down and forcing my tears back. Last night after the incident I had sent Zeus to help Cason back home and Nandy had accompanied me home in her car. I'd bursted right there in the car and had spilled everything to Nandy, feeling completely embarassed about it and I wasn't able to meet her eyes as I told her everything that had happened in past few months, the meets, the date like outing, the reunion, the cold war between us and the texts, everything.

After I was done, she'd been startled but assured me that it didn't change one bit of her opinion about me, if only she thought I was a bit stupid to fall for him and brave to be able to tell about it. Also she insisted on getting over him and getting interested in some girl so that it would go easy with my parents.

Faith gave me a side hug, rubbing circles on my back asking "Then why did he kiss you?"

"I don't know... He was drunk..... maybe he thought I was Josephine, we're the same height..." I mumbled in a hoarse voice.

"Asher, you deserve better, just... we'll work on you forgetting about Cason alright, no talking of him from now on and just focus on you're studies, you're grades have been dropping since this depression kicked in and I don't want you failing exams in the end, let's work on not bringing up Cason." Ivara said clenching her fists.

"I think Ivara's right dude, I think now that you know he likes someone else, you should move on." Doris said looking down at me as he stood beside Faith who stayed silent and kept circling her hands on my back.

"Why does this always happen to me..." I said burying my head in my hands. "I fell for Cason who, I don't know for what twisted reason I fell for, I don't even know the guy anymore!! My dad hates me and my mother is certainly disgusted by me and thinks I've failed her." I poured out "I am not a good enough student cause my grades are falling... I've been a terrible friend by trying to get Cason when I had an inkling he and Josephine we're together... I.. I wasn't a good enough cousin cause I almost outed him to the fam... I...I am such a disasterous failure..." I rambled as Faith hugged me tighter asking me to stop in a pleasing manner.

"Asher, stop it!!" Ivara yelled pulling my face up with her hands, making me look straight into her eyes glinting with anger. Her voice rung in the empty laboratory and the adjacent halls.

"Stop degrading yourself just cause a boy you loved couldn't see you the same way!!" She said in a voice higher than usual.

"Look at me" she said as I darted my eyes to the floor frowning cause I know she's right. I glanced up as she continued "Cason isn't the end of the world Ash, you have many other things and YOU ARE NOT A DISASTEROUS FAILURE, you get that? Don't you forget how good a friend you've been to the four of us, how you always helped taht stupid cuz of yours with his relationship problems, how you tried stopping what you feel for the sake of you're parents and Josephine, how our Biology professor and we trust you to score a perfect hundred and make it in med school and don't you ever forget how much of a good person you are which though may have been you're downfall in the past, doesn't necessarily mean will still be so in the future. You will find someone who sees all of this and even you're shortcomings and still loves you and treats you the way you deserve to be treated. So stop cussing yourself and be strong for you're own sake and if not for you, then atleast for me and these guys. We love you and care for you Ash and it pains me to see you this way... You know how unemotional a person I am and maybe that's why you don't see but trust me seeing you in such state is one of the worst things I've experienced and I'm willing to do anything to get you out of it." She said softly, exhaling air through mouth to calm herself.