Coldmess

Twentieth street

Hey guys,
Okay warning:A very very long and important chapter ahead. I could have broken it like usual in two parts but I guess it would be better if you guys read it in one go

~

{Asher's Pov}

The week after being selected into the finale, I barely managed to rejoice of my achievement. My parents were happy though that I'd finally started to work on my stage fear and Faith and Ivara were kind enough to not pounce on me with questions. It was really incredible that just by looking at me the next day, Faith had said ' Cason's a douche bag' and Ivara too, looking at my face, clenched her jaw muttering absurdities which were directed at Cas.

However much I tried to keep my mind off Cason, the image of him and Stacey kissing out was carved on my heart with a knife. I had cried myself to sleep the first two nights but after that I only felt hollow.

Besides that, Doris had found out about Cas and me. Technically Faith had told him when I'd requested her to. After finding out though, things had taken a turn for the worst. As I had been afraid, he'd avoided me like plague since past week and that too did nothing but dampen my spirits to the core.

"Hey kiddo, help me with the kitchen?" My dad asked me pulling me out of my sad reverie.

"Uhh sure dad." I said absentmindedly following him to the kitchen. As I helped with the veggies, we made small talk. Mom had asked Dad to make noodles for her and that's what I was helping with. Noodles made by my dad, were one of my favourite items to devour but today, I couldn't get myself to feel the usual chirpiness I felt whenever dad agreed to make them. I worked silently and dad observed it.

"I think you got FOMO son. Guys you're age should step outside, play some ball , get tanned but here you are locked up in the house like a princess. Man up kid." He said in a mocking tone but the numbness I felt was far greater. His words did hurt me but when you torch an already burner person, they can only but feel the little pain as just a garnish over their already present wounds.

Besides that, I had almost flunked in an Physics test the next day after the semifinals and I had been relieved of my WiFi password, my dad feeling that my social media interaction was the reason behind my drop in grades. Yes, I used it for distracting myself but only to pry my mind of the boy I had never even thought of giving my heart to. I wondered why this was happening, of all 7 billion people on the earth why did it have to be Cason who I fell for and that too in all of my friends when he was the most distant one from me.

My dad only recieved an unwilling 'Yes' from me and didn't stop lashing me with absolutely not motivational and heavily unuseful words. He went as far as to compare me with the innocent gay guy living upstream our street and even called me a 'sissy'. My indifference and numbness only added to his irritation and in return he kept on degrading me to get a reaction from me.

No, I don't think my dad was completely heartless, he was a real gem when it came to a few things. But it was his habit to keep nagging about something he didn't appreciate so that I'd react and overcome my short comings, and it worked until last year but since then, I had stopped feeling the hurt as much.

With all due respect, my father, though a real gentleman and a fairly open-minded person, believed that as a son, I was not only obliged to love and respect him but also to fear him and never cross him. Too bad, the fear of him and his occasional outbursts when he literally broke things in the house, had sublimated over the years as I grew.

He'd firmly believed that 'spare the rod and you'll spoil the child' concept in my early years as a teen but even that didn't really bother me as much anymore. The last option he used was to make me feel guilty of something and that's what he tried resorting to right now as his mean banter about me not being enough manly and outgoing and being too dependent on social media and having the 'fear of being left out' yielded no fruit.