Lillian's P.O.V
The first group of people ring the doorbell. Maryann grabs my arm and runs down the stairs, pulling me behind her. We get to the door and Maryann smooths out her dress before opening it. Standing on the porch are three boys, two of them I've seen in the hall before. "Hey Maryann." says the boy in the blue shirt.
"Hey guys come on in." Maryann smiles. They step inside. "You're the first ones here."
One boy looks at me. "Who's this?" he asks Maryann.
"This is Lillian Espinosa. She's a freshman."
"Are you related to Matthew Espinosa?" The boy in green asks.
"Um yeah. He's my brother." my voice sounds small.
"Do you get to go to Magcon with him?" Obviously not.
"Well he already left." Nobody says anything for a few seconds then the boy with the black shirt speaks. "Is it true you tried to kill yourself?"
Oh god. "What? No I um.." I look at Maryann.
"You don't just ask people that." says the boy in the blue and smacks the other boy on the back of the head.
How did they even find out? I bet some of my old friends are telling people. I hope the rest of the party isn't like this.
I turn to Maryann. "I'm gonna go to the bathroom. Just to freshen up before the party."
"Okay it's down that hallway, third door on your left." She gives me an apologetic half smile.
I walk until I'm out of eyesight then I run the rest of the way. When I get to the bathroom I close the door and lock it. I try not to cry but memories from my suicide attempt flood my mind.
flashback
After running home from school I slam my front door and collapse in a mess of sobs. Everybody hates me. They hate me almost as much as I hate myself. I'm so screwed up and everybody knows it. I know what I have to do.
I grab all of my dad's pills from the cabinet. My phone rings and I ignore the call without checking who it was.
Should I leave a note? I'm sure they'll understand without a note. Enough thinking about it just do it. I go to my room. My phone rings again and this time I check the caller ID. It's Matthew. "Hello?" my voice sounds shaky.
"Lillian? Are you okay?" concern is clear in his voice. No. I'm not okay.
"I can't do it anymore, Matty." I start crying.
"Woah Lillian calm down. Do what?"
"Everything. Live" I answer.
"Hey listen to me. You're strong you can get through this. Don't do anything you might regret. Please Lillian." I can tell Matt is crying now.
"I miss you." I tell my brother.
"I'm only an hour away. Do you want me to come home?" No he's suppose to meet fans today.
"No just meet your fans."
"Lil I'm sorry I haven't been around lately. Please don't do anything, I love you."
"I love you too. I'm sorry you have such a messed up sister." I choke on my tears.
"You aren't. Stay there I'm coming home. Don't hurt yourself."
"I can't. Everything already hurts and I'm tired of it. I'm so sorry." I hang up on Matthew.
I open the pill bottle and start taking all of them. I start getting dizzy and fall to the floor. I'm about to die. I can feel it.
What's that noise? I hear sirens. Did Matthew call 911? My bedroom door bursts open and Alex runs in. "Lillian what the hell did you do?" He picks up the empty pill bottle. "Shit." he kneels next to me. "The ambulance is coming."
"No Alex please. Just go away." I do not want to go to the hospital.
"I'm not just gonna let you die."
"But I want to."
"Lillian..." Alex starts but the paramedics rush through the door and put me on a stretcher. Alex doesn't leave my side as I'm loaded into the ambulance.
The last thing I hear from him as I close my eyes is "Don't give up Lillian."
end of flashback
I don't realize I'm crying until I feel the teardrops on my hand.
"Lillian come on the party's starting!" I hear Maryann yell. I wipe my tears, leave the bathroom and join Maryann.
YOU ARE READING
Beginnings and Endings (magcon fanfic)
Fanfic{ ONGOING } When Matthew decides to move to California with his Vine buddies what will happen to his little sister, Lillian as she deals with high school, an abusive father and losing the most important thing in her life: her brother. Will Lillian g...
