A/N
I KNOW I SAID THIS WOUOD BE OUT SOONER BUT IM REALLY TRYING TO PUAH THROUGH FOR MY LAST QUARTER AT COLLEGE. ANYWAY IF YOU HAVEN'T ALREADY GO READ MY NEW BOOK CLOSE! I WILL PUBLISH THE SECOND CHAPTER WHEN WE REACH 100 READS AND AROUND 15-20 VOTES! ANYWAY ENJOY THIS CHAPTER AND THANK YOU ALL SO MUCH FOR CONTINUING TO READ MY STORIES!!
10:00 o'clock pm.
5 new missed calls from Harry and counting.
Harry was originally supposed to pick the kids up from daycare after work but after what I saw today, I didn't want him or her anywhere near my children. I knew the two of us agreed that two months would be our limit but I've come to a realization that two months wouldn't work for me, no amount of time would work for me if I'm being completely honest with myself. I've always told myself I would never be able to share my man and that statement still remains just as relevant even now, in this situation.
The kids are fast asleep after filling their little bellies with Happy Meals and smoothies from McDonalds so Harry's absence was soon forgotten after the red boxes were placed in their laps. Love and Hip Hop plays silently on the main room television as I sit at one of the bar stools at the counter sipping close to half a bottle of red wine. My mother use to repeat this action as I was growing up and her and my dad always used to get into pointless arguments, I knew whenever she played her drama filled reality shows and sipped wine straight from the bottle itself that it was mommy time. I never quite understand why she would drink her sorrows away till the point where she was hardly functional but in this moment I understood. This is where it became relevant and not just a statement.
As a mom you want to paid this perfect reality to your children both old and young and want the world to portray you as this cheerful saint, but in reality I'm drowning in my own head and don't know the particular steps to take in order to truly help myself. So while my children are peacefully sleeping and my baby daddy is inches deep in a ran through movie star, here I am footing the bill for everything in my life alone. Raising and providing for two expensive children, affording a roof, clothes and food for the kids and myself and even daycare a few times a week gets to be a lot for just a one income household.
I've always envisioned myself in that large house in the center of a gated community, kids running up and down the streets laughing and playing with one another, a husband to be there for me and for I to be there for him whenever the time warranted. I just never imagined my life to be what it turned out to be. After successfully polishing off a second glass of wine, I return the cup to the kitchen sink, grab the bottle and plop my ass onto the cushioned couch to drown my own problems out with other useless drama.
My eyes begin to grow too heavy and too intoxicated to stay open and the last thing I remember before drifting into a dream like state is the flash of Harry's name across the screen of my phone and Cardi B tossing a drink in some girls face in a bar.
—
Mornings like this I always beat myself up for drinking on a weekday knowing I have to head back to work the next day. The morning dragged on and seemed to move in slow motion. Neither of the kids wanted to cooperate and listen to what I told them to do, I felt like pure shit and the three of our mornings were practically ruined with two crying babies and a grumpy momma.
Styles Enterprise enters into my sight and I loudly groan to myself. "Why'd I have to be this mans baby momma?" I whine in the comfort of my car but an onlooker from the left of my car seems interested and has his eyes glued to me.
After pulling into the parking garage and riding the elevator up to Harry's floor I step off and I'm immediately met with a fuming Harry. "Goodmorning Mr.Styles." I lazily smile due to lack of sleep and an intense hangover and attempt to walk past Harry but my wrist is grabbed and I'm stopped in place. "Please follow me to my office." Without another word said or glance back, I'm pulled towards Harry's office without even a word of my own input.
