When We Almost Made It (Discontinued)

18 | Unreciprocated Feelings They Ruin Even The Best Of Friendships

Zaire's POV:
Today is the start of an important era of my life. I Zaire Aubrey Rowe have officially obtained a boyfriend.

And I have met a new friend who goes by the name of Rose Collins. I was wary of her at first but after having lunch with her she seems great.

It was a little awkward at first because first conversations are always awkward. That and me being socially awkward.

But eventually we moved past it. And I asked her about why she wanted to become an artist. Turns out it's a coping mechanism for her with her anxiety.

I was surprised about her openness about it. I had always kept things like that a secret. Although looking back, keeping secrets is what has been isolating me from making friends. So I should be taking a page from her book.

I asked her if she would be interested in doing art for my cover album. She said only if I agreed to sing for one of her art premieres.

I agreed of course. Because number one based off her notebook her at skills are way better than mine, so I definitely want her to do my album art. And number two singing there would help get my name out there. It's a two-fer I guess.

So all in all today was pretty great day. The only thing that tarnished it was school. Which is thankfully over for the day but my teachers as always decided to give us loads of homework.

But it's fine I'm going to procrastinate and put off doing it until I get home. For now I will enjoy spending time with Alec at the pier.

"So," I say turning to Alec. "When did you first start liking me?"

"Why do you want to know," Alec says starting to blush.

"Because of reasons I don't feel like sharing." Honestly it's because I want to see if I liked him first or not.

"That's not a real answer but fine. It was not the first time that we met just in case you were wondering. It was around the time that I met your parents at the dinner over my house."

"Interesting," I say. I'm actually relieved that he didn't say it was when we first met.

I just don't think it's possible to like someone romantically after seeing them once. I think you should at least be somewhat friends first before liking someone. I mean don't you want to get to know them before you start to like them.

"What about you, " he says. "When did you first start liking me?"

"It was around the same time actually. Just a little bit later."

"Well that's just great," he says laughing.

"What is?"

"We've liked each other for months and we never said anything."

"Well I was sort of afraid that you didn't like me. And that if I told you we couldn't be friends anymore."

"Why? I mean even if I didn't like you we could have still been friends."

"No we couldn't have. Because once you introduce feelings well, Unreciprocated Feelings They Ruin Even The Best Of Friendships."

"That's dark."

"Well I believe that it's true. And sometimes the truth..."

"Sometimes the truth is a hard thing to bear."

"Exactly," I say smiling.

"You've really been on a depressing wave today are you okay?"

"Yeah i'm fine,"

'Liar."

'Shut up.'

"Okay let me rephrase that question. On a scale of one to ten. Ten being rock bottom. Five being numb. And one being on cloud nine. Where exactly are you?"

"A five point five maybe?"

"Explain."

"Well you see..." I trail off because my phone starts buzzing. "One second I have a notification."

I check my phone and see that my mom has texted me.

Mom: Where are you?

Me: I am at the pier.

Mom: It's getting late you need to come home.

Me: Okay mom. I am on my way.

Unfortunately for me my mother considers 4pm late on a Monday.

"I'm sorry Alec my mom wants me to come home."

"No no if your mom is asking for you to go home you should."

What did I do to meet someone so understanding.

"Do you want me to walk you home," he asks picking up our bags and handing me mine.

"No I think I will be fine. Besides if my parents want me to come home yours probably do too."

"You're right. Honestly we should have left about thirty minutes ago."

"Yeah well I'll see you tomorrow," I say waving goodbye.

"See you," he replies waving as well.

Welp now it is time to begin the walk home. I pull out my headphones and phone then I go to spotify. I locate the playlist I want to listen. And wait for the music to start.

The beautiful voice of Halsey begins and I start walking. Yes as I am sure you are aware by now I like Halsey.

Now don't judge me about my music choice. I am aware there are lots of people who think she's overrated and she isn't a good singer and all of that stuff.

But I really do not care. Her music is calming for me so leave me alone. Now moving on the music begins to play and I start to hum along.

Five minutes later I start singing out loud. And I was actually enjoying it too but then people starting starting at me so I stopped. Yes my career is being a singer.

Yes it involves singing in public in front of people. Yes I know that is precisely what I was just doing. So no I shouldn't have stopped.

But the thing is even though I know with my future profession I will have to sing in public. I still get scared about singing in public. And it's all stems from my social anxiety.

Seems weird right? Well it's a great thing everything about me is weird.

"I'm home," I say opening the door to my house.

"Hello Zaire," my mom says. "Dinner is not finished yet but it will be soon. So until then you can go upstairs and work on your homework."

"Okay," I say heading up the stairs.

See what I mean about the homework thing I said nothing about me having homework but my mom just knew. Because I always have homework.

But it's fine I'm almost done with high school. And then relatively soon I'll be done with college and my days of doing homework will be over.