Theories of Insanity

1 | Move-In

August

1 | Move-In

Monday, August 28, 2017

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Insanity:

I feel like everyone has heard the phrase 'insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results'. That's all fine and dandy and sure makes for some great motivational posters, but the actual definition of 'insanity' is 'extreme foolishness or irrationality'. And for our purposes, that is exactly what this entire book entails: a recollection of the absolute most insane experiences of my life, which all coincidentally happened to occur during my freshman year of college.

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I was beyond ready to go to college. So much so that I had started planning out my packing list and everything I would buy once I got out to Utah two days after I got my acceptance letter back in March. And then that excitement was rekindled again when I got the letter with roommate assignments and rule reminders in July.

            I was ready to get out of Virginia, in all honesty. Moving 2,089 miles away may have seemed like a bit of a ways to go for college, but I had dreamed of attending Legered since I was a kid, as their Creative Writing program was one of the best in the country. Sure, I had to follow a bunch of rules put in place by the religious associates that ran the university, but I was already a pretty religious person myself—it wasn't going to be difficult to follow their rules. (1)

            Although, as I write this I'm pretty much reading that last sentence like the one SpongeBob meme where every other letter is uppercase because it's May of 2018 and I know that some stuff went down about those rules. But we're not even close to being there yet. Moving on.

            I was rolling two suitcases behind me, my brand-new student ID tucked in my back pocket as my parents dragged the rest of my luggage with them. The plane ride had felt like nothing, the drive from the airport to Spanish Fork had felt like even less (probably because it was), and I felt like I was already a student here. A student who was about to step foot in her new apartment for the very first time.

            We got to the door of apartment 1320 and I swiped my ID in the card reader to unlock the door, feeling like I was about to walk into a five-star hotel room. My parents followed me in and I walked into the very first bedroom off the main entrance, which I had determined was mine from the map that the housing complex emailed me a few weeks earlier.

            I walked into the bedroom and almost ran directly into another girl, who jumped back at the last second to prevent a crash. I dropped my suitcases instantly and we did the stereotypical scream of two girls who were determined to like each other without knowing a single thing about the other person except for their name and phone number. I was also pretty sure she was from Nevada.

            "Hi! Madison?" I asked, screaming and giving her a huge hug and she nodded, also screaming. "I'm Morgan! I'm going to be your roommate!"

            "Oh my goodness, this is so exciting." Madison giggled, "I just got here yesterday, so I'm pretty much all moved in, but I can't wait to see how you decorate your side of the room!" (2)

            I laughed and nodded as my parents filed in and introduced themselves to Madison one by one. She shook their hands politely before turning back to me.

            "So I'll totally give you some space to unpack. I'm gonna call my sister to let her know I'm all good and I don't need her to come and check in on me." She rolled her eyes, "Older sisters can be so overbearing! Do you have any?"