Theories of Insanity

10 | Stomp & Slam

10 | Stomp & Slam

Saturday, October 14, 2017

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Insanity:

Getting legitimately angry over forgetting about plans you were included in.

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It had been six days since my breakup with Peter, and it had been approximately five days and twenty-two hours since I had gotten over it. I was an incredibly emotionless person, so two hours to get over a breakup was pushing it for me in the first place.

More than anything else, this breakup made me want to fix two things about myself: my weight and my hair.

But one chapter per fix, am I right? This particular Saturday marked the fifth day in a row that Ashley and I had gone to the gym together. We had decided to go after classes every day, but since it was Saturday and we didn't have class, we chose instead to go to the gym at 10:00 in the morning and have the rest of the day to ourselves.

I always had a Netflix show I was watching, like 99% of other college students. (1) At this particular time, that show happened to be How I Met Your Mother, and I was determined to finish it before it got taken off of Netflix. Ashley had already seen it once all the way through, so that Saturday was decided to be a day for marathoning How I Met Your Mother.

We had already gone to the gym, so we were done being productive. Ashley got the remote for the TV while I rummaged through the pantry for snacks.

Only, there was a problem.

"Hey, Ash?"

"Yeah?"

I looked down in confusion, unsure of whether or not I was being crazy. "Did you eat my pudding?"

"I can't have pudding, I'm gluten-free." Ashley replied idly, "Why, is some of it missing?"

I nodded, looking down at the formerly-unopened four-pack of chocolate swirl pudding that I had been incredibly excited to eat. There were only two left in the pack, despite my name being written in giant block letters on the top of the packaging.

"That's odd." Ashley said, "Who do you think took it?"

I knew exactly who had taken it. Ashley didn't, so that knocked one person off the list. Samantha had her own pudding with her name on it in her cabinet, and Paige and Christina were doing a sugar-free diet together.

So that left Madison. And it made sense—two days earlier, I had found her taking ibuprofen out of my desk drawer. (2)

"It was Madison." I muttered, walking over to the couch with a bag of popcorn and my two remaining pudding cups. "But whatever. I'll just like...lock up all my food and medicine from now on."

Ashley shook her head, laughing slightly.

"Well, you can forget about that while we binge-watch the best show on Netflix."

"True." I laughed and plopped myself down on the couch as the front door opened, "Did you find the episode I'm on?"

Ashley nodded.

"Of course I did."

We turned on the show and I settled back into the couch, allowing myself to relax for what felt like the first time in a month. College was stressful. College was really stressful.