Before Anything Else (Absinthe Series 2)

Kabanata 22

Kabanata 22

Before Anything Else

I startled when I heard an aggressive knocking on the door. Napatingin ako sa salamin sa aking harapan bago ko narinig ang isang pamilyar na boses.

"Zeppy, di ka pa ba tapos diyan?" I heard Adina asked from outside.

" Hindi pa. I'll be out in two minutes." I replied. Inayos ko ang towel na nakapulupot sa aking buhok bago kinuha ang toothbrush para magsepilyo.

When I was done, I untangled the towel off my hair. Tinungo ko ang pintuan at binuksan ang pinto. Bumungad sa akin ang nakangusong mukha ni Adina habang nakatayo sa harap ng pinto.

" What took you so long?" aniya, medyo inis dahil sa aking katagalan.

" I was just thinking of something. Sorry I spaced out." paumanhin ko at iniwas ang tingin sa kaniya.

She shrugged. Umalis ako sa pintuan upang siya naman ang makapasok. I held the towel on my elbow before I located my room.

The feeling was always new whenever I enter my room. Naninibago pa rin ako matapos ang ilang taon. Everything is always new to me every single day. Ang pwesto ng kama, ang kulay ng pader and posisyon ng bintana...palagi kong naiisip ang lugar kung saan ako nanggaling, kung saan ako natuto sa lahat ng bagay.

Bumuntong-hininga ako bago isinampay ang towel sa sampayan nito. I combed my damp hair using my fingers while I walked towards the balcony of my room.

The sight of the ocean calms me. Bawat hagod ng hanging nanggagaling sa dagat ay kinakalma ako. I've always love it here. Lalong-lalo na kapag lumulubog ang araw. The water becomes orange because of the sunset. Kumikislap sa bawat hagod ng sinag ng araw.

It's a new day, Forah. A new battle. Araw-araw ay may kaniya-kaniya tayong labang ipinapanalo at minsan, itinatalo. But what's more important is that at the end of the day, there's always a lesson.

Bumalik na ako bago pa ako matagalan sa pag tanaw sa dagat. Although it was inviting, I was getting ready for work. Hindi ko gustong mapagalitan dahil late ako sa pagpasok.

I found Adina on the living room tying her black sneakers. Nakapusod na ang kaniyang buhok at mukhang handa ng pumasok. I watched her as she tied the laces tightly before she grunted.

"Let's go?" I asked her. Tumayo na siya at kinuha ang kaniyang bag. She grabbed her car keys before walking outside. Sumunod ako at ini-lock na ang pinto ng kaniyang bahay.

I've been living with Adina for the past six years. Sobrang tagal na nga and yet I couldn't purchase a house of my own. Siguro sa kadahilanang ayaw ko rin namang umalis at ayaw kong iwan si Adina.

I met her six years ago noong bagong lipat pa ako dito sa probinsiya ng Marina. I was problematic and lost. Hindi ko alam kung ano ang patutunguhan ko matapos kong malaamn ang kasinungalingan ng aking pamilya. Too broken, I found myself drifting away.

Sa paglipas ng panahon, unti-unti ko ring natanggap ang lahat. It's what I do best; accepting everything. Ngunit hindi pa rin naman nababawasan ang sakit. I could never move on from the pain. All my life, I was living in lies. Hindi ko na kilala ang sarili ko kaya mahirap ring tanggapin na ang buhay na kinagisnan ko ay hindi naman pala akin. Hindi naman pala dapat para sa akin.

It was easy to escape from the life I had before. I need no explanations because from the very start, it was already a plan. Ang mga taong mahal ko mismo ang nagplano sa kahahantungan ng buhay kong ito. From the very beginning, my life was already caged and chained. Like the bird that I was, I untangled the secrets of my life. I broke the chains and I was able to get out of that cage.