Find Me

Ch. 1

Alexia's pov

Do you ever have so many secrets you need to tell someone, but can't because if you do you know I'll crush them and create them pain? If so, welcome to my life. Where my life has many similarities of my moms but I refuse to admit that to her. So I suffer in silence to protect her.

I walk through the halls with my head low in a desperate attempt to just blend in with the rest of the school. It never works so I really don't know why I bother. But it's Friday, maybe I'll have a little luck right?

The absolute second I feel hands on my back, and pain in my body when it slams into the lockers, I know I'm wrong. I should know better by now. There's no escaping this doom. Natalie never misses a day of torment.

"Well if it isn't the earths biggest mistake in front of me." Natalie smirks.

I stand tense knowing what I'm about to endure is going to hurt. It always does.

"I can't relate to being an accidental pregnancy and the biggest mistake my parents have ever made. What's it like being their biggest regret in life." Natalie asks.

I remain silent and fearful as part of me beloved what she's said. I know I was an accident. My mom has me when she was 18. But she's been an amazing mom and I know she loves me. My dad has been a great father as well. But I can't help but wonder if the ever wish they didn't really have me.

"SPEAK!" She yells.

I remain silent. It's better to stay silent because when I do speak my words are always twisted and somehow the school believes a rumor Natalie has started. If I stay silent then everyone knows that if she says I spoke then it's a lie. I don't speak.

But that doesn't mean Natalie doesn't start rumors. The new one she started is that she saw me self harm. To the school it's a rumor. She hasn't seen me and she hasn't seen it. I don't cut where it's visible. That's stupid. If I cut on my arms then my mom would know. I don't have to just hide it from the school. I have to hide it from her and that's a challenging task. So I make sure to cut where it's covered at all times. Hence how my mom nor dad have found out.

I close my eyes the second I see her hand raise. I feel an incredible amount of pain in my cheek and when I open my eyes her fist is coming towards my stomach.

I bite the inside of my lip to keep the screams as her fists connects with my already majorly bruised stomach adding to the already existing burn in my cheek.

"Your parents are just waiting for you to create self murder to get rid of the thing they wish they'd have aborted. They thought you'd be something other than a major disappointment. They were wrong." She continues as the beatings continue for me.

As the insults continue so does the beating and by the end, I'm left on the floor shaking from the pain.

I get up from the floor and every muscle in my body screams and begs me to stop moving as I do so. But I know I need to get to the bathroom. I don't want the rest of this school to see the aftermath of Natalie. So I make the very painful journey to the bathroom.

The first thing I do is clean the blood from my nose and mouth. When that's completed I reach in my backpack for the bottle of Tylenol. I use a water bottle no telling how old to wash the 4 pills down and toss the bottle into the garbage.

I drop the pills back into my backpack just as the bell rings and I know there's a very long day ahead of me. A very long and painful day ahead of me.

"Can someone just put me out of my misery already?" I mutter to myself before waking to class.

When I walk into the room I drop my backpack under my desk as my teacher places my last test on my desk.