Chapter Forty-Seven

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Days were starting to blur together. Three, four days had passed by, I think.

All of them were the same.

All of them didn't have Gummy in them.

Everyone around me was making sure I was okay.

Louis made sure everything was taken care of.
Cat made sure I always looked presentable.
Liam made sure I ate.
Dylan made sure I was protected.
Zayn made sure I was always safe.
Harry made sure I was never alone.

But I felt alone.

Many wolves came to pay their respects to my grandmother. Most of them were rogues. And a lot of them went to me to say their condolences.

They would tell me how they knew my grandmother. Tell me stories how she helped them. Tell me how kind and warm she was.

Everyone kept telling me how Gummy looked like she was just sleeping. They told me that she looked peaceful, and that it was good she wasn't suffering anymore.

I'd only smile and nod in response.

I felt mechanical, like I was doing everything because it was what everyone expected me to.

Louis handle everything. I didn't need to lift a finger to help arrange Gummy's wake.
I wore the clothes Cat picked out for me to wear.
I ate the food Liam gave me.
I stayed within sight of the wolves from Dylan's pack.
I didn't even mind that Zayn and I were in the same room and that he was always looking at me like I was going to break any second.
And I let Harry hold me tight when we went to sleep every night.

I did everything they expected me to.

Except cry.

Even when we buried Gummy next to Mom, I didn't cry. I could hear the soft sniffles and wails around me but it was like it wasn't real, like I was watching everything happen and wasn't really living in it.

We had come home from the funeral a few hours ago. Harry, Liam, and Louis had gone back home with me.

I was exhausted. I didn't know why. I just felt drained. So I had trudged straight to bed and went to take a nap.

When I opened my eyes again, I found that I was alone in my dim room for the first time in a few days.

I could hear voices downstairs. More people had come while I was asleep - Dylan and Zayn, I think. I wasn't even surprised. I knew they were all just looking out for me. I would occasionally see them glancing at me with worried eyes but I would pretend I didn't see.

There was nothing to worry about. I was fine.

I was fine.

"We need to do something," Liam said. "It's weird she hasn't even cried."

"She's not even talking. I don't think I heard her utter a word these past few days," Dylan added. "Has she talked to you, Harry?"

"No."

"That shit's not normal for her. She always says what she feels," Zayn said.

"Well it's not like we can force her to cry," Louis said. "If this is how she wants to cope with the loss, then let her."

"We should talk to her when she wakes up," Dylan said.

"You shouldn't even have come here. She'd only feel like we're cornering her," Harry said. "Louis is right. We should let her be for now. She'd come talk to us when she's ready."

Zayn scoffed, "And you think you're a fucking good judge of how she feels? You don't know Elle like I do. I say one of us talk to her."

"You may have known her longer, but that doesn't mean you get her. Especially with how she's feeling," Harry spat back.

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