carla
jordan
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"hello."
"why do you sound so angry?"
"im not angry."
"sure."
"im just aggressively opening straws. every. thing. is. fine."
"no its not. stop. please carla."
"why do you even care"
"because somehow those straws will end up in an ocean and kill thousands of turtles"
"ugh i hate how that worked. appealing to the environmentalist in me."
"now you know i actually listen."
"actually wait. whered you get all those straws that are like prepackaged?"
"um i bought a pack"
"you went out of your way to get a package of straws just to open them like a maniac"
"uh yes."
"nice. so....do you wanna vent or just wallow away in pure anger"
"uh i dont know if you would get it"
"try me."
"its just that im dumb."
"what? what are you talking about?"
"ok maybe im not dumb dumb. like im intelligent, i know i have the brains to get me places. but some people are just—excuse my language— so fucking infuriating and think im dumb and are so stuck on that."
"like my math teacher today pulled me aside and was like 'i have no idea why youre in this class..' blah blah you have bad grade and dont do the homeworks."
"its like she waiting for me to trip up and get a bad grade so she can march her ass down to guidance and move me to a lower level class—where by that point the system would be working against me."
"and why did you think i wouldnt understand this?"
"because you sound so smart and educated on the phone. here i am with people who want me to be dumb or i guess be dumber than they already perceive me to be."
"you dont think i understand?"
"uh. no?"
"its kind of the opposite but because ive worked my ass off to be in high level classes, and people always always use this piece of knowledge to perceive me as wayyy smartyer than i actually am. so many people become friends with me so that later on the only reason why they talk to me is for homework answers. im just as smart as the next person, but people hold me to a high standard and i hate that. and i know this seems counter productive but we have to break those peoples prejudices. being angry will not help us, ok?"
"youre right."
"i know i am"
"and you wonder why people think youre smart...its because you throw shit like that in their face"
"um what"
"im joking. i understand what youre saying, ok?"
"....ok. but just take a deep breath"
"im sorry"
"for what"
"for using my defense mechanism—aka my horrible sense of humor—on you. i- its just that i didnt know how to respond and obviously i offended you. so im sorry"
"apology accepted. ok? i understand what youre going through."
"thank you. seriously for being there for me."
"youre welcome carla."
"so anyway whyd you call?"
"that's not important right now, ok? ill talk to you later."
"oh. bye jordan"
"bye carla."
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guys there is character development heading your way!! um i think this book is gonna be around 30 parts - i dont know. im waiting for the climatic part because honestly i have no idea how to write it. im really proud of how far this has come already lol and im already making plans to rewrite!!
-lila
YOU ARE READING
The Dangers of Butt Dialing
ChickLit"ive probably been butt dialing you..." "butt dialing. you. butt. dialed. me." -------------------- carlas life was running pretty smoothly until she keeps receiving calls from an unknown caller. her life starts to change in the form of late night c...
