carla
jordan
————————————————
*please refer to playlist (sober)*
"hey jordan."
"hi."
"its been a week since we talked...and, and i know you needed space and i respect that and i gave you that, and im willing to give you more space...if you need it?"
"uh i dont think ill need it...carla"
"ok"
"can we— uh let me start over, im thankful for the time to think...and i have been thinking about my feelings, what i said, and your feelings. i just—can we stop talking like we're afraid of stepping on each other's toes? i want to clear the air and make my understanding of the situation clearer"
"of course...so do you wanna start the interrogation? or me?"
"well i mean its not really an interrogation, maybe more like each of us explaining things?"
"yea of course. i meant that as a joke though, silly."
"haha this reminds me of one of our first conversations"
"look how far we've come"
"yea now we're here"
"now we're here."
"..."
"..."
"i—i like you carla. i want to be the guy who takes you out, sets a smile on your face, because you are breathtaking. truly."
"i didnt even have to see your face in order to know that you are a gorgeous angel inside and out"
"um thank you jordan"
"but you have the other guy"
"um yea, so luke."
"when you first called me about him, you said something about how the universe sent you a sign, and on top of that you sounded so happy"
"i got INSANELY jealous and angry, more so at myself, so i ignored you for such a long time."
"i have no idea what to say"
"and what really ticked me off was when you said you thought you were falling for him. i—i selfishly thought that it should have been me you were falling for because well, im falling for you."
"oh, jordan"
"i still am, pretty hard."
"fuck. jordan. im so so sorry."
"youre a talented, funny, smart and all-around good soul, and i wish you were happy. youre my best friend, and i never open up to anyone. but i really like luke, and perhaps i was a little rash in that moment but i like luke a lot."
"i know you like him...hell i can tell in your voice whenever you talk about him. i want you to be happy. ok?"
"ok."
"youre crying."
"..."
"im sorry; i wish i didnt cause the pain you feel, or i wish i could talk to you in person"
"i um...jordan, i feel really conflicted, because for one, youre my best friend, and you know me so well, and for two, i dont want to put any part of that friendship in jeopardy, and three, i feel a pull towards luke. i like him a lot."
"ill be honest with you, carla, i drank a lot at that party because i felt like i could drown myself in alcohol and forget everything, as cliche as that sounds"
"its not cliche. people do that, albeit its terrible for your body and mind"
"even when my mom died, i told myself to stay away from alcohol, i wouldnt use it as a crutch. i saw my friends, like chris, use it like alcohol fixes everything, but it makes the situation 10x worse."
"youre right."
"so... not to keep saying this, but i like you. and i think i'm gonna have to give myself space in order to get over you. i truly dont mean to hurt you. i just need to find myself in a way? please dont cry. ive thought about it for a while...but i dont think we should stop talking for a while."
"what?! no! jordan, listen to me, you can't do this. youre my best friend!"
"carla, you dont understand. i'm falling for you. like falling in love with YOU. if i keep talking to you while you dont like me in the way i like you, i'll get insanely jealous and not to mention, lose my mind."
"so thats it? you're gonna leave your best friend all alone because you can't get over being friend-zoned!?"
"listen, carla, i understand that you're angry with m--"
"oh angry? you think this is anger? this is me done with you and this shit! you were the person i could trust, you were literally my best friend!"
"i don't mean to hurt you carla, but my state of mind will implode on itself if i keep tal--"
"what about me?"
"i--im sorry carla."
"for now, i can't keep talking to you, but maybe someday the universe will dote on us, and we'll be able to be carla & jordan"
"im sorry but bye carla."
L I N E G O E S D E A D
YOU ARE READING
The Dangers of Butt Dialing
ChickLit"ive probably been butt dialing you..." "butt dialing. you. butt. dialed. me." -------------------- carlas life was running pretty smoothly until she keeps receiving calls from an unknown caller. her life starts to change in the form of late night c...
