All I Need

二

The ride to practice was long and quiet. At least it was for Namjoon.

The other members were in the back of the van talking and laughing, while Namjoon sat in the front next to the driver alone.

He felt overwhelming loneliness.

The rain hit the window and the sky was dark.

The weather reflected his mood perfectly.

It's seems to be raining a lot lately.

Never a break.

"Forever rain.." Namjoon mumbled to himself.

The rain making pelting noises as it hit the window reminded him of the countless times Jimin has knocked on Namjoon's studio door to remind him to not overwork himself.

"When it rains I get a little feeling that I do have a friend..." Namjoon mumbled once again.

"Keeps knocking on my windows.." Namjoon said barely audible to even himself.

Though, the knocks from Jimin have been gone for some time now.

.

Namjoon dropped the shiny metallic razor into the sink as he clenched his jaw in pain. He ran his bloody wrist under the water and hissed at the pain.

Namjoon found a box of razors for shaving in the cabinet.

He couldn't resist.

I deserve the punishment.

I'm a horrible leader.

I'm fat.

I'm ugly.

I can't dance.

Namjoon let tears run down his cheeks as the water became clear. He turned the water off and looked at himself in the mirror.

His eyes are red and puffy. His face is pale and his hair is a mess.

He was snapped from his tear streaked face as his slashed wrist began to throb.

More blood was starting to dot at the multiple lines littered across his wrist.

.

Namjoon smiled every now and then when the members would laugh. He had to keep up a facade.

Do not worry the members.

Then again, they don't even care.

__________________

Did you guys see some of the lyrics form RM's "Forever Rain"?

I want this story to be his experience or "cause" for writing Mono.

Lol