the boy who was afraid of the dark

wednesday 16:15, lucas

as soon as school let out that day i went straight home.
  i had found myself friends in william, chris, and lucille, on top of le gang. so it's not that i was isolated or alone or anything. it's just the rumors. the rumors that were everywhere. i couldn't escape them.

  unless i went home to my beautiful boyfriend.

  i was a little surprised that lisa wasn't on the couch watching TV when i walked in, but it wasn't enough to distract me from my destination.

  however i quickly found the answer when i opened my bedroom door and was greeted with two bodies laying in my bed, surrounded by half empty bags of food and staring intensely at a screen.

  oh. well. okay then.

  "um...hi." i waved.

  without a second's hesitation they both hissed a shushing sound and waved me off.

  i was taken aback, but by the time i got over it the credits had already started rolling.

  "sorry," lisa cleared her throat. "we were having a harry potter marathon."

  i nodded suspiciously, "right. okay."

  she didn't move, but just kept staring at me with eliott.
  then she finally got bored.

  "okay," she got up. "bye."

  and then she was gone.

  instead of taking her spot, i just plopped right down on eliott.

  he smiled his full face smile, and pointed back at the door. "i like her."

  i rolled my eyes and finally closed the distance between our lips.

  i slid my hands around his back and up his neck into his hair, where his hands travelled down my back and firmly onto my butt.

  as embarrassing as it is to admit, i giggled like a little girl when he squeezed.

  then he broke contact and started playing with my hair, "how was school?"

  "mmhm." i mumbled. i didn't really catch the question. i was looking at his eyes.

  clearly he wasn't satisfied with that answer.

  he stopped touching me and locked our eyes together, "i want a real answer."

  i gave him a warm smile and pecked his lips.
  "i'm not lying to you, school was good. there might be some rumors going around...but we have a lot of good people helping us out and supporting us. i've made friends out of william, chris, and even lucille."

  he raised an eyebrow, "lucille? really?"

  i nodded.

  he though about it, then shrugged, "she was never the type to hold a grudge. she's a really good person. i know she deserves better than me."

  "eliott," i cocked my head. "you ARE a good person. you also deserve the best. the problem with you two wasn't your fault. you know that right?"

  he looked at me for another second, then just nodded.
  i smiled and this time he reached up for a peck.

  i didn't speak as he stared at me. i could have, but the expression on his face told me not to. it looked like he was debating. something important. he had a decision to make and i wasn't going to disturb it. i was just gonna sit here quietly and let him stare at me while he thinks.

  but then he stopped thinking, "i have to tell you something."

  he broke the eye contact and rolled me off of him before sitting up on the edge of the bed.
  he took my hand and led me to sit right across from him.

  i nodded in understanding. i had a pretty good idea of what it was.

  he didn't say it at first. he just held my hand and stared at the floor. he did that for a while. as much as i wanted to tell him to spit it out, i knew i could never. it was hard to admit what he was about to, an awfully vulnerable thing to share. so i masked my anxiousness as best as i could and waited patiently for him to figure it all out.

  he sucked in really hard, then let out a fat breath of air.
  "lucas," he finally began. "there's something different about me. something you don't know."

  instead of speaking, i just nodded, allowing him to go on.

  "my mind...works differently. differently from other people's and differently from yours. there's nothing i can do about it other than take my pills, but i can't control it." he sighed again and choked up on his words a bit.

  a tear formed on his eye but i reached up and wiped it away.

  he looked at me finally, but then back down at the floor again.
  "i-i was diagnosed with bipolar disorder." he mumbled, barely out of earshot. he didn't break eye contact from the floor.

  now, i already knew this. but i didn't want him to know that i already knew. so how was i supposed to react? i didn't think about it. obviously i didn't care. i love him for who he is, and that won't change because of a mental disorder. it's not his fault. and i knew that.

  then i finally made up my mind.
  i breathed in, and let the air out.

  i reached out to gently lift his chin and make eye contact.
  "okay," i nodded calmly once his eyes were looking into mine. "thank you for telling me."

  i gently smiled.

  his face was a wet, teary mess as he finally cracked a smile and tackled me into the biggest bear hug you could ever imagine.