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Alright I'm gonna post this and see how it goes. A lot has happened with the sidemen since the last time I updated but let's just go with it.

I laid on the grass as the party went on around me. I didn't want to drink or dance or smoke. I wanted to be with Simon so bad, but the words he spat at me hurt me so much.

I almost lost my channel and everything because he wanted to post his feelings on social media.

What a little baby.

"Y/n?" I look and see Leen "you're at a awesome party and you're laying on grass" she laughed sitting besides me "what's that messed up mind thinking about this time?"

"Who else" I frown "I want to fix everything, so bad but I feel like whatever I do, or say will get thrown around and messed up" I say. My phone vibrated and I picked up seeing a reminder

6 months with Simon 🥺

"Six months? Wow that's half a year" she smirked taking a drink of her beer

"Wow I would have never guessed" I say sarcastically. I open up twitter and post a picture of us

@yourtwitter 6 months with the boy who I love with my whole heart . I wouldn't want it to be with anyone else.

I shut my phone off and turn to her. She gave me a soft smile and sighed

"Stay the weekend, but your ass is going back, no ifs ands or buts" she laughed. "Y/n your life has been a wreck but it's a been a good wreck. Don't run away from everything like I did, I'm lucky to have met these people but LA is nothing compared to over there" she tells me "you're here because I had a breakdown" she tells me

"Wait I'm here because I had a breakdown" I say confused "oh wait, okay I get it now. Oh dear Leen why did you have a breakdown" I fake gasp

"I'm gay" she says. I laugh and look at her

"Haha?" I question "Leen are you serious" I say tearing up

"Yeah, I don't like dick, after Cal? No, I just wanted attention then I thought about" she said "I don't want a guys attention I want a girls attention. I love girls" she smiled

"I'm glad you do" I smile "I love simon minter" I smile

"That's obvious" she laughed. I smiled and laid my head on her shoulder

"What a life" I say with a small smile

"What a life indeed" I say. "I think I might tell him" I whisper

"Are you prepared for it?" She asked "for anything and everything"

"Yes Leen make me question this decision even more than I have to" I groan

"That's my job" she laughed. I sighed and laid back

"I have to, Leen I feel like I will never let this go if I don't. If it's meant to be then he will understand, if it's not" I stop and close my eyes. Thinking of all the memories we've had, thinking of the laughs and kisses we shared.

"Simon minter it's pouring rain outside and you want to play football!" I yell from the car window. I watch the tall boy run into the field and start kicking the ball around

"My love, this ball won't be kicked without you" he smiled

"Technically it can because you're kicking it" I yell

"My love when else can we play football when it's raining, just us me and you" he smiled. I groaned and took my favorite jacket off and threw it in the back seat

"I and you" I yelled getting out of the car. I closed the door and walked into the field with him. "First to what?" I asked with a sly smirk

"To ten" he smiled and kicked the ball towards me.

After countless times of slipping and falling into the mud. Simon and I laughed till our cheeks hurt and stomachs aches.

"Simon minter I love you" I smile.

"I love you more Y/f/n" he grinned kissing me softly.

"Then it simply isn't meant to be" I whispered. I look at Leen and she gave me a soft smile

"Let's get you back, we can book you a flight and you can get this done" she gave me her hand and we stood up. On the way out we said our goodbyes and walked to her place.

We said goodnight and I went to the guest bedroom and laid down. I felt my phone buzz and smile to myself

@miniminter : Happy 6 months to my favorite girl. I love you so much y/n can't wait till you're back in my arms.

My eyes flicker to the top of my phone as I see a text messages from him.

Simon
I didn't mean to make you leave

Y/n
You didn't make me leave my love

Simon
why'd you go out there then

Y/n
Leen was going through some stuff

Simon
Okay babe, come back to my arms when you're back?

Y/n
I promise my love

I smiled at my phone and shut my phone off. I plugged it in the charger and just hoped. I just hope everything will be better from here on.

A/n
Oof I hope this is good okay by loves let me know if I can continue

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