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Next day

Leen (surprise)

I tapped the steering wheel and looked at there house. Do I tell Simon or do I confront Josh about it

So much is going through my head. I took a deep breath and got out the car. Here goes nothing, I walked up the steps and knocked on there door.

"Get the door!" I heard a voice yell the door opened

"Leen" he smiled my stomach dropped

"I uh hey Cal" I stuttered he chuckled

"What up"

"I need to talk to-"

"Leen" it was Simon, he invited me inside I smiled walked in awkwardly "is everything ok" he leaned against the island

"Um not really" I muttered his smiled faded.

"Who's at the door-oh hey Leen" Josh smiled

"I need to talk to you" he nodded slowly, I followed him upstairs and we went to his room

"What up" he smiled

"How would you feel is Y/N was paying Freya to date you?" I questioned his smile faded and went pale. He went and closed the door and locked it

"Why did she tell you" he panicked

"She didn't, I overheard her conversation with you" I crossed my arms.

"Why were you being so nosey" he snapped

"Why are paying someone to love your best friend" I spat at him, he glared at me

"That wasn't right of you" he muttered

"Well I'm being a GOOD friend and wanted to help her" I glared at him

"Leen, you can't tell anyone" he pleaded

"Simon my best friend, ok and that, that's fucked up" I whispered not wanting them to hear

"I know, but would you rather have your friend get hate by millions probably billions coming out gay"

"And why would he get hate?!"

"He's not gay, therefore he does it as a joke" he frowned "Leen, he was so hopeless he had his punishment all planned out, He even has strategies for dealing with hate" I rolled my eyes

"Josh, your such a fuken liar" I turned and left, he grabbed my wrist and pulled me back

"I'm not, follow me" he whispered we walked to Simon room, he was still downstairs. We walked in his room, Josh went to the his bed and lift up the mattress he pulled out a journal

"Let's go to my room" he whispered I rolled my eyes nodded we walked to my room. "Look" he handed me the book I opened it up and read the first page.

When I loose

-block out the jokes from the guys, listen to music

-post video on april fools day. Some fans may get the joke

-let the LGBT community you love them a lot and didn't meant to hurt feelings

I felt my heart break, I scimmed through and found strategies

Strategies

-block comments

-stay off the internet

-move back home (mum love)

-just focus on FIFA videos (no more skits or pranks)

-suicide

I felt tears fall, I closed it and gave it to Josh quickly

"Get that away from me" I cried

"You saw strategies, didn't you" I nodded and cried "that's why, we can't turn back now"

"Danm it Josh, why did you have to do all this, how did you find that" I wiped my tears

"I was scared for him, and when he left to take y/n out for a date, I went to his room"

"And you call me noisy"

"I wish I wasn't" he frowned we sat on the bed "we should look through more, just to see if he's okay"

"But that's his dairy" I argued

"Were his beat friends?" I nodded "we need to see if he's okay, right?"

"Fine" I sighed he nodded.

8/4/16

What up, why am I writing in this?? I guess I just need someone to talk to. I made a stupid bet with JJ now I need a girlfriend. I'm not very social

Help

8/5/16

I hate life, I've tried so much and so many girls rejected me. What's wrong with me!!! Am I not perfect enough. Am I too skinny, to tall, to nerdy what am I!!! What's wring with me am I really that ugly! I just want to be loved. I kinda like this bet maybe I can find someone to love me
But nobody loves me wow look at that the tears are falling now I'm such a little girl. I just don't get it at all. I want to feel loved and have someone tell Me I'm good enough
I'm not perfect but perfect to them
I want someone to hold in my arms
I want somebody to say they love me
I want to tell someone I love them

8/11/16

Haven't wrote in awhile sorry
I met someone today. She's really nice her name Y/N,
That's a nice name, very cute so is her face. What even am I doing?!?! But she nice and is willing to help a doof like me her laugh was so cute. Later on we texted. I'm guess you wondering how.....I was stalking her.....but she forgave me :).

8/14/16

So the girls pranked us today....
I almost shat myself. But that day I decided to ask Y/N out. I haven't asked her out yet. I will soon. Josh is finding more stuff out for me. I'm really excited she is the best girl I have ever met. She makes me happy and laugh her jokes and smiled can end world war everywhere. That didn't make sense but who fucken cares she the best things that has most likely ever happen to me.

8/18/16

I took Y/N out on a date :)
Best.Day.Ever
Her laugh and smiles made me so happy. She beat me at go cart racing
I honestly think she might be the one It's still early to tell but I don't care, she's amazing and also I made new beatfriends hey this whole thing is not just about Y/N there name Leen and Miko. She cool and chill but there this one girl I wanna meet. She thought me and Harry were strippers ._. I'm taking that as a compliment anyway I'll write soon

"He's a weirdo" I muttered Josh nodded

"Promise Leen" Josh closed the book. I took a deep breath

"I promise"

****

WOW LEEN YOU WOW JOSH YOU WOW AND SIMON MY BABE AFAJAVAIvhav

If you want more like this let me know. I also love reading your comments they make me happy :) and thanks for everything also is your in for.some laughs I suggest to read Fanboys by KSIdemen cause um that book SLAYS ok well

peace

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