Captivation

8: Bravery

Bravery (noun): courageous behavior or character/

The girl he brought home left the next morning, after awkwardly running into me, because I woke up before she and Henry and the others on the ship.

"Ah Madelyn." Henry says, once they see me.

"Hi." I say, sitting on the side of the ship, dangerously close to the edge. Sometimes I wish I were one of those sea ladies all of these old shipman claim to see, a mermaid.

"Madelyn, this is Madeline. Isn't t funny how similar your names are?" He asks.

"What I think is funny, is how you will not remember her name a week from now." I say, looking out at the calm morning waves.

They are both silent. I don't look at either of them, I don't want to see her crushed, horrified expression, to see her wish of being special break in front of my eyes. I don't want to see his, playful, upper handed expression turn sour, dark and cloudy.

I hear her leave the ship, I hear her murmur a goodbye to Henry and then I turn and head to my room, refusing to make eye contact with Henry. I feel his dagger like gaze hit me, but I don't turn. I don't let it touch me.

***

Tonight is a final farewell party for us, or the crew, or really, just for Henry. I've been at Genevieve's since this morning and I saw Henry walk off somewhere with the crew. Jane smears something cold on my face and Mary is filing my finger nails.

A girl enters the room with white blonde hair, lighter than the rest, and picks up a brush. "I'm Evelyn." She tells me. "I'm one of the teachers here, and I'll be fixing your hair." She tells me with a smile, looking at my dark hair like a foreign object.

I wonder if I've bee upgraded, having a teacher do my hair instead of Jane or Mary. "Thank you." I tell her, partially lying. I'm not really grateful for being poked and prodded. "Why is tonight such a big deal?" I ask.

"Because it's the final party." Genevieve says. "Everyone will be there, the Duke hosts it. If there was ever a night to be noticed, it will be tonight."

I nod. I don't really want to be noticed, but it is kind of nice to have my hair done and feel pretty, even if I wouldn't admit it. Soon I'm being whisked away to another room, where Mary starts putting on makeup. "Stop blinking." She tells me.

"I have to blink, Mary." I tease her.

"I have to make you look nice, so stop blinking." She orders.

"I don't already look pretty?" I pretend to be horrified.

"Be quiet." Mary tells me, dismissing my jests. Evelyn resumes curling my hair and Jane walks in with a gray dress.

"Genevieve said you would like this one." Jane tells me. I do like it actually. It will probably be suffocating on, but it's beautiful.

"Thank you, I do." I make a noise of pain as Evelyn rips a piece of my hair out.

We sit in silence, the only noise the ones of my hair falling from the hot iron, and the way the makeup sounds as it get picked up and put down. Mary has to help me fit myself into the dress, which has a neckline like a 'v.'

"I look like a whore." I tell Genevieve.

"Watch your language." She tells me, whacking me in my pretty curly up do with a newspaper.

"I don't think my chest even knows what the inside of this dress feels like." I tell her, continuing on. Genevieve sighs.

"Do you want to fit in?" She asks me.