only yours | gxg

「18」

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O B S C U R E

(a). Not discovered or known about; uncertain.

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I spent the night alone in the spare bedroom offered to me by Raven after Ashley decided to take her leave to start looking for a new place. She continued to remind me that she wanted to move out anyways, and that the dorm life wasn't for her.

Before she could even attempt to pull me in for a hug before leaving, I instinctively pulled away. My momentary desperation for contact faded. I came to terms with the idea that I'd be better off staying away from people, due to a lack of trust in myself. I refused to stay attached to anything or anyone.

I barely slept at all. My eyes flickered between the beige ceiling and the velvet curtains, watching impatiently as I wished to beckon the rays to fill the room up faster. My body felt like it would crumble apart.

By the time I decided there was enough light in the room, I shoved the duvet off of my body and stood, walking out of the room with a slight limp.

To my surprise, Raven was awake at the counter of the open kitchen, sitting and flicking through various sheets of paper scattered across the counter. I rubbed my heavy eyes and walked over to her.

"Good morning." she spoke briefly. She wore a white shirt that contrasted with her dark, flowing hair.

"Morning." I mumbled, staring as she became transfixed again on the sheets below her. "What are you doing?" I asked, taking a seat opposite her, on the other side of the white marble counter.

"Hm, work." she hummed, "Plans, information about Christian and his dealings, wondering why he's as fucked as he is." she spoke harshly. I raised an eyebrow.

"Dealings?" I asked innocently, unaware of what she was talking about. He was a normal guy with a normal job at a cafe, his only dealings were with his customers.

"You look like you need a coffee." she changed the subject abruptly, still looking down at the scattered papers. "There should be things already prepared in the guest room's bathroom. It's an en-suite. Go get ready for the day and come and have some breakfast." Raven dismissed me, though it felt weirdly polite.

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"Raven," I called out, watching her back turn away from the stove and turning towards me. I smelt the strong fragrance of bitter coffee and sweet mango.

"Yes, Alyson?"

"You didn't leave my phone behind did you?"

Raven shook her head, attention on the pan again as she flipped the pancake over.

"I pushed my foot down onto it and picked up the scraps before I got you. It's all been discarded of. I can get you a replacement today." she stated with full confidence, letting me know it wasn't a choice again.

"Thank you." I replied honestly. "I'm not in a rush for it, there is nobody I need to speak to at the moment."

I took a seat at the counter whilst Raven plated up the pancakes, scooping up pieces of diced mango to sit beside them.