matt ignored joba's cries and pleas, grabbing a skateboard by the door and making his way outside. he skated down the block, getting lost in the new surroundings. he found a park and walked over to it, anger filling his body once again.
matt grabbed the skateboard, yelling and crying as he smashed it against a nearby tree. he yelled and cried until his throat burned and his eyes were so hazy that it was impossible to see anything. matt sat on the concrete floor, wiping his eyes as his body shook from the soft cries he couldn't hold in. he felt so alone, like he was when he was back home. he felt powerless against his own mind.
the smaller boy's phone rang, joba's contact popping on the screen. matt took a deep breath, accepting the call.
"matt! where are you?"
"joba, i don't know i'm at a random park."
matt's voice was broken and rough, making joba's heart break. it was all his fault.
"i'll be right there, matty."
matt just nodded, rubbed his eyes, and ended the call. he began crying again, cold air pushing against his face. his eyes scanned the area, landing on the smashed board. he absentmindedly picked up a piece of the wood and held onto it tightly. he whimpered as he felt the thin wood pierce into his hand, frowning and tossing the wood aside. he stood to his feet as he saw joba messily park his truck and run over to matt.
matt held his bleeding hand as joba crashed his body into his, crying and kissing the top of his head. matt said nothing as joba asked him about his hand. matt just cried as his eyes met joba's, the older male picked up the younger, carrying him to his car.
after arriving back to joba's house, matt somehow ended up with his sleeve rolled up, sitting on joba's kitchen counter as joba tried to pick the small pieces of wood out of his wound.
"after we get this gash cleaned up, we can run you a bath, matty."
matt just nodded. matt's eyes met joba's once more, growing interested in the pool of colors that sat in them. before matt could control himself, he leaned in and kissed joba. joba just stood there, shocked at the shy boy's actions. joba stood between matt's open thighs, squeezing them softly as he kissed back.
matt pulled away, humming. he was confused about what was going on with joba, so he said what they were both wondering.
"i thought you didn't like me like that..."
"while you were gone, i sat in the living room and was worried sick about you. i was nervous about where you'd gone and if you were alright. ian came back with the rest of the guys and told me off. i don't remember what he was saying though. all i could think about was you, matt. as i sat there and watched as ian yelled at me, i realized that i truly do love you. i was so pushed into a straight agenda growing up that i didn't think i'd ever fall in love with another man. i was scared of my own sexuality so much that i turned to making you hate me rather than just accepting myself, matt. i love you so fucking much, i promise."
joba's face was in matt's neck, kissing the skin softly. matt smiled and wrapped his arms around the taller male. he felt like everything was slowly getting better for him.
"i love you, russell."
joba smiled warmly against matt's neck.
"i love you too, matthew."
the end
